All signs now point to the Big 12 expanding sooner rather than later. An announcement Tuesday afternoon from commissioner Bob Bowlsby and Oklahoma president David Boren, the chair of the Big 12's board of directors, noted the conference would actively evaluate schools who showed prior interest to joining.

"A number of universities, as you well know, have contacted the Big 12 to express interest in our conference," Boren said. "And the board today directed the commissioner to actively evaluate their interests and to report back those evaluations which he will make back to the board at a future board meeting."

This, of course, was a complete 180 from the direction the conference seemed to take heading into media days. As of last month, Big 12 expansion was all but officially six-feet under, but a report from Monday night that the ACC would be getting a conference channel with ESPN showed that cable perhaps wasn't completely dead after all and that there was still money to be made in a major media rights agreement.

Now the question becomes which programs will the Big 12 choose? And will it expand by two or four teams? The reality remains there are no perfect options for expansion, and according to CBS Sports' Dennis Dodd, it's unlikely that ESPN and Fox will extend their current deal with the league.

But if more money's on the table right now, that appears to be good enough for the flip-flopping Big 12. And because this conference's overall lack of direction and unity is just the best, we figured it would be most appropriate if it picked its new members in truly outrageous ways.

Truly, truly outrageous.

Here's how.

1. Choose two winners "Hunger Games" style. There are about eight schools that have routinely been connected to expansion, give or take a couple. That's more than enough to field a Hunger Games type of competition.

The rules are simple: Everyone starts on equal footing. Everyone has access to the same weapons at the center of the arena, all of which have a Big 12 flair. Which ones will the contestants choose? The Mountaineer's musket? (It's a powerful firearm, but takes 10 years to reload.) How about a pistol from Texas Tech or Oklahoma State? Perhaps the best defense is to form alliances, keeping in touch with them through Mockingjay(hawks).

And remember, the other contestants aren't the only threat; the environment can be lethal as well. Wait, what's that chill in the air? Oh no! It's the Gamemakers adjusting the climate to a December night in Ames, Iowa!

2. Host a medieval jousting competition. Don't lie, you want to see this as much as I do, because jousting is amazing. If the Big 12 really wanted to, it could get creative with this. Shopping cart jousting. Bike jousting. Car jousting. Boat jousting. For expansion purposes, though, the conference should go with the sport's original form.

With Bowlsby and the conference's board of directors looking on from their luxury box, put the presidents or chancellors of the prospective expansion targets in full body armor while they clamor for an explanation, saddle them on a horse and give them a lance. Then slap that horse on the rear end and watch 'em fly.

Make it an event, too. Serve turkey legs to the crowd and broadcast it on ESPN. (The idea of schools eliminating one another on the very network that would give them more money is deliciously savage.)

In true Big 12 fashion, there will be "One True Champion" guaranteed admittance with an additional battle for second place.

3. Hold a gladiator match. If this sounds ruthless, it's because it is. But there's a real opportunity to put a bear or a wildcat on a chain behind a trap door in the center of the arena. For that matter, have the Boomer Schooner and Masked Rider flying around out there and raising hell.

Don't forget: The Mountaineer is ready for some good ol' fashioned wrasslin' at a moment's notice and early-adaptation Pistol Pete is here to scare the bejesus out of the fighters.

What a circus it would be. But we ask you this ...