First there was that whole ... thing ... with the LSU and Alabama fans in a New Orleans Krystal. And now, from the Northwest Florida Daily News, comes the news that chanting "War Eagle" in a Whataburger at 2:20 a.m. could get both you and an acquaintance of yours punched in the face.
According to a police report filed by the Okaloosa County Sheriff's Office, a man standing in line at the local Whataburger franchise had been "repeatedly chanting 'War Eagle'" when a "brief argument" broke out between the man and two strangers in the restaurant. The argument ended with both of the strangers reportedly punching the presumed Auburn fan "near his left eye with a closed fist."
Per the report, the alleged victim returned the punch, but the assailants fled on foot. One of the two stopped in the parking lot long enough, however, to also punch (in the face) a man sitting on top of a car hood. The second victim was the brother of a woman who had been with the first victim inside the Whataburger.
No arrests were reported as the assailants fled the scene. They did, however, pay for their transgressions by having to leave behind their Whataburger meals.
Fortunately, we have a simple, effective solution to prevent this recent trend of Southern fast-food lawlessness from becoming a full-blown epidemic. Have you ever heard of an incident like this happening at a Chick-Fil-A, the happiest SEC-friendly fast-food restaurant there is? Of course not*. So if Chick-Fil-A would just decide to keep their franchises open 24 hours a day, this is a problem we can just go ahead and nip in the bud.
Oh, and those midnight banana pudding shakes? Why, those would be just a handy fringe benefit.
*No doubt somewhere out there is an arrest report of some brawl that broke out in a Chick-Fil-A. But we're happy pretending otherwise, thanks.
HT: WarBlogle.Keep up with the latest college football news from around the country. From the opening kick of the year all the way through the offseason, CBSSports.com has you covered with this daily newsletter. View a preview.
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