Petty as I am, the idea appealed to me right away. No. 1 LSU has already beaten No. 2 Alabama by three points this season, so if Alabama turns around and beats LSU in the BCS title game -- especially if Alabama wins by three points or less -- let's have a split championship between the two schools.
Brilliant, right? And fair, too. It would be the perfect response to a BCS rematch nobody wanted, other than SEC fans and Top 25 voters (same thing).
That's where I stood for a good 15 minutes, maybe even 20. But then a really deep thought occurred to me, a thought so undeniably true that I couldn't ignore it. Here's the thought, as it pertains to the idea that Alabama and LSU should split the national title:
Seriously, that was my thought. And just as seriously, that's all it took for me to hop off the bandwagon that started small this week, with a single AP voter in Albuquerque, N.M., who told CBSSports.com's Dennis Dodd that he will vote LSU at No. 1, even if LSU loses the title game to Alabama. That's the movement, one guy in Albuquerque, but I suspect it will grow. Again, I was ready to hop aboard the first time I caught wind of it, probably because I'm already on record as saying Oklahoma State, not Alabama, should be playing LSU for the title. Just like that, a Top 25 voter in Albuquerque gave me the perfect out:
Split national title! Brilliant!
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But, no. Stupid.
The BCS is stupid, and a rematch between LSU and Alabama is stupid, but let's not fight stupid with stupid, huh? Not even if that would be the point of this possible uprising -- reacting to the latest BCS controversy with so much stupid, it would force the powers that be to reevaluate their inane little system.
Because that's just not going to happen. The BCS will be reevaluated when, and only when, it ceases to make a fortune for the handful of men who run it. Until then we're stuck with it. So if Alabama beats LSU, Alabama is the national champion. Anything else would be stupid, and it's like my man George said in Hoosiers: There's two kinds of stupid. A guy that gets naked and runs out in the snow and barks at the moon -- and a guy who does the same thing in my living room.
College football is the living room of this great country. Or something like that. So let's keep our clothes on and act like adults.
And let's be fair to Alabama -- and to LSU. There can't be a single person within the LSU program who would want a share of the national championship after losing something called the "national championship game." A real competitor, and LSU is nothing if not full of real competitors, doesn't want to win like that. A real competitor would rather lose with honor than win with a condescending pat on the head, which is what we would be doing if we patted LSU on the head after a narrow loss to Alabama on Jan. 9 and told the Tigers, "There-there, young fellow. Here's a share of the title for you. And a lollipop."
But enough about LSU. Let's be fair to Alabama, too. Even though lots of us wanted Oklahoma State to get this opportunity against LSU, that didn't happen. We can pitch a fit, or we can move on. This isn't Wall Street, and Alabama isn't the 1 percent. Let's not occupy the BCS title game and make a mockery of the whole thing.
LSU has a month to get ready for Alabama. A month to heal injuries, plan strategy, send out a search party for quarterback Jordan Jefferson. This should be the best LSU team we've seen all year, and we've seen LSU lay waste to some great teams already. Arkansas got embarrassed, and Arkansas might be one of the best four teams in the country. West Virginia got demolished, and West Virginia is in the Orange Bowl. Oregon, Georgia, Auburn ... thrashed, all of them. This LSU team, all lathered and Honey Badgered, is so good it's scary.
So here's what we're going to do: We're going to tell Alabama, assuming Alabama beats this scary-good LSU team in the BCS title game, that we're so impressed with its accomplishment that we're going to give Alabama a whole share of the national title. To go with the share we're giving to the team it just beat, LSU.
Don't go there. Take it from someone who has been there for 15 minutes, maybe 20 -- that's a stupid place to be.