Is it just me or have the Knuckleheads taken over?
The cadre of offseason miscreants earns a capital "K" at this point in the offseason because there are so many of them. Tis the season for misbehavin' -- May, June, July. Boredom sets in. Players are trapped on empty campuses with little else but time on, and weights in, their hands.
To summarize reams of police reports:
- Willie Williams -- he of the 12 arrests at age 19 -- is being wooed by Miami. It is almost laughable that he is currently on probation after violating a previous probation. The only sentence left is double secret probation.
- Up the road, three Florida International players were nearing double-digit felony charges earlier this month after an alleged crime spree. The lowlights: Police say one player, it's not clear which, pistol whipped a student and then shot out the window of a car.
- At Florida State, the motto is, "If you can't beat 'em ... beat 'em." Tallahassee police said they had to use pepper spray and a stun gun to subdue 290-pound offensive lineman Bobby Meeks. Police say Meeks was resisting arrest by kicking and punching officers outside a club. Apparently what the Tally cops call resisting rest, some players call Saturday night. If that's not bad enough, Meek's uncle was charged with battery in an alleged fight with officers.
- The same night in the same town, Florida A&M kicker Paul Johnson was charged with DUI after being found passed out in his car along the side of the road. Not sure if the car was parked wide right of the median.
- A bunch of K-heads in Memphis have virtually ripped the heart out of preseason expectations after a series of arrests. Arson and counterfeiting allegations are never a good thing for a program coming off its first bowl win in 32 years.
- A bit of old news, but Virginia Tech's Marcus Vick has screwed up so big (allegedly) he has become the subject of Vick's in the Cradle, a knockoff of the old Harry Chapin tune Cat's in the Cradle. And Lil' Vick's in the program with a silver spoon Hasn't played a down and is handed the moon ... The sad part of a delinquency-to-a-minor charge as well as reckless driving and DUI charges is that Vick apparently still has a chance to play for the Hokies. He has been suspended only "indefinitely." What, is Frank Beamer waiting for Vick to join up with the FIU players before kicking him off?
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| Team | '03 Record | Pvs* | Season Opener |
| 1. Georgia | 11-3 | 1 | Sept. 4 vs. Ga. Southern |
| Flap your gums about the main concerns (sacks, running game), the season comes down to Oct. 2 at home against LSU. | |||
| 2. LSU | 13-1 | 2 | Sept. 4 vs. Oregon State |
| What do the Tigers have to play for? They want it all, not just a half. | |||
| 3. Oklahoma | 12-2 | 3 | Sept. 4 vs. B. Green |
| Has Bob Stoops lost his magic? The season ended with a two-game losing streak and the departure of brother Mike. | |||
| 4. Southern California | 12-1 | 4 | Aug. 28 vs. Virginia Tech |
| Mike Williams is the antithesis of The Human Distraction, Maurice Clarett. Folks can't wait to see if the uber-receiver back at Troy. | |||
| 5. Florida State | 10-3 | 6 | Sept. 6 at Miami (Fla.) |
| Best team in Florida until at least Sept. 6 at the Orange Bowl. | |||
| 6. Texas | 10-3 | 7 | Sept. 4 vs. North Texas |
| Six consecutive top 25 finishes. One of five teams to win at least 10 each of the past three years. Pressure? What pressure? Bring on Oklahoma. | |||
| 7. Miami (Fla.) | 11-2 | 5 | Sept. 6 vs. Florida State |
| Injured tailback Frank Gore not being counted on anytime soon. Tyrone Moss' work ethic being questioned. Just what 'Canes need: More pressure on Brock Berlin. | |||
| 8. Michigan | 10-3 | 8 | Sept. 4 vs. Miami (Ohio) |
| The Matt Gutierrez era begins with a Rose Bowl? | |||
| 9. Florida | 8-5 | 9 | Sept. 4 vs. Middle Tenn. |
| Ron Zook's recruiting classes begin to pay off. Chris Leak gets invited to New York for the Heisman ceremony. | |||
| 10. Kansas State | 11-4 | 10 | Sept. 4 vs. W. Kentucky |
| Have to have faith that the coaching staff will get Dylan Meier ready to be the new quarterback. If not, Darren Sproles will struggle. | |||
| 11. Virginia | 8-5 | 14 | Sept. 4 at Temple |
| Clearly the No. 3 team in the new ACC. Could be No. 2 if the Cavaliers can beat Miami on Nov. 13 at home. | |||
| 12. Ohio State | 11-2 | 12 | Sept. 4 vs. Cincinnati |
| At least A.J. Hawk didn't get arrested this offseason. Doesn't matter as long as Tressel keeps beating Michigan. | |||
| 13. West Virginia | 8-5 | 22 | Sept. 4 vs. East Carolina |
| A BCS hot potato if the 'Neers win the crippled Big East. Even at 10-1, what major bowl looks forward to taking a 10-1 West Virginia? | |||
| 14. Clemson | 9-4 | NR | Sept. 4 vs. Wake Forest |
| Back in the Top 25 after Dodd was slapped in public by Tommy Bowden. | |||
| 15. Louisville | 9-4 | 11 | Sept. 5 vs. Kentucky |
| Auburn's new/old/soon-to-be coach (Bobby Petrino) goes out with a bang by winning Conference USA. | |||
| 16. Purdue | 9-4 | 16 | Sept. 5 vs. Syracuse |
| Undervalued everywhere except here. Kyle Orton could be the best player in the Big Ten. | |||
| 17. Maryland | 10-3 | 17 | Sept. 4 vs. N. Illinois |
| Fridge finds it hard to win 10 again in the performance-enhanced ACC. | |||
| 18. Utah | 10-2 | 18 | Sept. 2 vs. Texas A&M |
| Will Urban Meyer's conscience allow him to leave after two years? In Meyer's first year, the Utes set an attendance record and got first win at home vs. ranked team since 1973. | |||
| 19. Auburn | 8-5 | 19 | Sept. 4 vs. La.-Monroe |
| Pencil in Cadillac Williams for 1,500 yards and Al Borges as his new best friend. | |||
| 20. Texas Christian | 11-2 | 15 | Sept. 2 vs. Northwestern |
| Frogs' 52 victories the last six years is the best run since the 1930s. Fourteen starters return to challenge for a BCS berth. | |||
| 21. California | 8-6 | 21 | Sept. 4 at Air Force |
| This year's USC. The Bears are loaded and expected to challenge for a Rose Bowl berth. They'll have to win in L.A. to do it. | |||
| 22. Nebraska | 10-3 | 23 | Sept. 4 vs. W. Illinois |
| Same makeup as Frank Solich's last team: Good defense and struggling offense. Should be good for 7-4 in Bill Callahan's first season. | |||
| 23. Tennessee | 10-3 | 20 | Sept. 4 vs. UNLV |
| Freshman quarterback Brent Schaeffer has been called "Little Vick." Let's hope they mean Michael, not Marcus. | |||
| 24. Boise State | 13-1 | NR | Sept. 4 vs. Idaho |
| We'd love to see this hyped non-BCS program challenge a BCS-conference school. The Broncos are 1-7 against BCS schools in the regular season since 1999. | |||
| 25. (tie) Memphis | 9-4 | 13 | Sept. 4 at Mississippi |
| Tigers got full of themselves with lofty preseason SportsLine.com ranking. Prospects dimmed after what look like significant off-field problems. | |||
| 25. (tie) Wash. State | 10-3 | 24 | Sept. 3 at New Mexico |
| Josh Swogger isn't exactly inexperienced (81 passes last year). Tight end Troy Bienemann will help. | |||
| * -- Previous ranking indicates Dodd's Pre-Spring Top 25. | |||
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| Team | Comment |
| Connecticut | Big East title more than a dream. |
| Fresno State | Pat Hill has won at least nine games in three consecutive seasons. |
| Iowa | Underrated? Could have two losses before October. |
| Minnesota | As long as Glen Mason is in Minny, Gophers will pound you. |
| Missouri | Suspect defense keeps Tigers out of the Top 25. |
| N.C. State | It's T.A. McClendon's team now. |
| Oregon | Rebuilding but Mike Bellotti is waaaay behind USC. |
| So. Miss | Might win Conference USA but tough non-cons against Nebraska, Cal and Alabama keep Eagles out of the Top 25. |
| Toledo | Rockets are this year's Miami (Ohio) in the MAC. |
| Wisconsin | Solid in both lines. |
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| Team | Conference |
| 1. Louisville | Conference USA |
| 2. Utah | Mountain West Conference |
| 3. TCU | Conference USA |
| 4. Boise State | Western Athletic Conference |
| 5. Memphis | Conference USA |
| 6. Southern Mississippi | Conference USA |
| 7. Toledo | Mid-American Conference |
| 8. Fresno State | Western Athletic Conference |
| 9. Hawaii | Western Athletic Conference |
| 10. Miami (Ohio) | Mid-American Conference |
