Mike's Malicious Mail: You're shooting lights-out
Mike's Malicious Mail has been away for a bit, eating grits, drinking daiquiris and watching pornos.
Frankly, we have been bored with your mail. It has been the usual pedantic nonsense and incoherent silliness.
In the future, send your boring mail to Doyel. He thrives on average.
Recently, though, you have been like Ko-Me Bryant, stepping up your insults, stupidity and foolishness. Good work, people.
In honor of your new game, we're going to answer your mail with quotes from the greatly written movie There Will Be Blood. Quotes from the oil prospector himself, Daniel Plainview.
Enjoy, angry people
"Hi Mike," writes PDubb, "sensitive issue here: McNamee says Bush is going to pardon Roger Clemens. Does that apply also to Barry Bonds or is this some exclusive club? Where was Bush's executive clemency when Michael Vick needed a hand? What about Marion Jones? I hope I'm not starting any trouble, but I'm sure you agree the question has to be asked."
Are you an angry man, PDubb?
From an anonymous loser about the NBA All-Star Game: "Cancel the game and let these overpaid crybabies have some rest."
There are times when I look at people and see nothing worth liking. I want to earn enough money that I can get away from everyone.
Asks Eric: "Are your lips still on Shaq's posterier?"
At least Mr. Plainview and I know how to spell posterior.
Writes a Ko-Me Bryant admirer and another poor speller: "your a joke. your whole (Ko-Me) Bryant stuff is crap. are you jealous?! yes you are. your a kobe hater and we know it. so grow up and call the man by his name. kobe bryant!!"
