Apology ain't no thing if the register don't ring

True, this doesn't fix the ball team, but times are tough out there, and getting out to a game isn't as easy as it used to be. And while we can't guarantee you will see a winning team right away because you can't turn a boat around that quickly, we can see to it that the people who feel the pain for this are us, not you.

We'd say we're sorry, but any blowhard can do that. This is what we can do now, until the team is improved the way we told you we would improve it. And if that doesn't work, we'll do more. And if that doesn't work, we'll probably be gone and someone else will try to do it.

So stick with us if you can, and if you can't, we understand. Just keep us in mind when we do get better.

Your pals (we hope), Bob and Walt.

Now isn't that better than "Trust us, and here's an '09 ticket brochure"? Not by much, no. But when you get to the point where you need to apologize to the customer, you've reached the point where you have to make the apology worth their while.

By that logic, of course, the Pirates should be playing for free, but that's a time-waster for another day.

Ray Ratto is a columnist for the San Francisco Chronicle.