Updated Oct. 9
You people are unbelievable. You're reading, free of charge, the most passionate and possibly even the most talented sports writer in the country (me, I mean). Not only do you not appreciate me, but you send me complaints ... and even writing tips!
Unreal. Do I come to your place of work and tell you a better way to scrub that toilet? I do not.
But then, Hate Mail doesn't do toilets. Or goose sex.
From: Dan Roland
In that story on Kimbo Slice, you were referring to yourself when you wrote, "What's good for that goose is definitely good for this gander." Do you realize "gander" is a gender reference? It doesn't fit with what you were saying.
Hahahaha so who did I call the woman in that analogy? Me? I don't know goose gender, but I know I'd make a good-looking woman. Believe that.
From: Steve K.
I love the Buckeyes and your Terrelle Pryor story is great to hear as a fan, but your writing style was choppy and very difficult to read.
You want longer sentences? I can do longer sentences. Or here's an idea: I'll stick with the style that has earned me millions of dollars and a legion of fans worldwide. Oh, wait. I have neither of those. Hmmm. Longer sentences, huh?
From: Bryan Jeebs
Your writing is OK until you decide to include something about politics. Your ignorant blanket statement about the next VP being "an idiot" reflects your media-biased ridiculous opinions.
I bet you would have been more receptive had I used longer sentences.
From: Peter Strauss
As a lifelong Badgers fan, it's difficult constantly complaining about our perpetual lack of respect followed by inevitable choke-jobs. After yet another heartbreaking loss to OSU and an end to our season's hopes, I was glad you wrote an article about the future of Badger football. Since you went to the game, I was expecting an endless vomiting of superlatives about Pryor.
Ahem. Guess you missed this regurgitation from Saturday night.
From: Dan
What the hell was that? A pro-Ohio State article? You made it a little harder for me to hate you. I still do hate you, of course, but that was the best article of your career. Savor the success -- it might be a while before you have it again.
I'm a lot like Greg Maddux -- just when you think you've got me figured out, I paint the opposite corner. He'll be in the Hall of Fame soon, and he did it without long sentences.
From: Jake Smith
Just curious, Gregg -- is Brett Favre still dead to you?
Brett Favre. Favre. Favre. The name rings a bell. You sure it's not spelled "Farve"?
From: Steve Thompson
Oh please, Doyel, we're not stupid. You've never liked Favre, so you cast Aaron Rodgers in the best light possible. You're pathetic and predictable. The fact is, the Pack is 2-3 without Favre, and their wins came against teams with a combined 1-7 record. If given a choice, Packer fans would get rid of Rodgers and bring back Favre in a heartbeat.
Packer fans also put cheese on their heads. Let's not give Packer fans too much credit, OK?
From: Charles Jensen
Wow, you really put your foot in it. This article on Tim Tebow is going to look really silly in 10 years when Tebow is a lock for the hall of fame.
The Circumcision Hall of Fame.
From: Andrew
Get me the column space and I'll write my opinion on Tebow, too. I agree with you, and allowing me the space to do it will make Freeman the wrongest. Green-light it and let's make it happen.
Those two words -- wronger and wrongest -- generated all sorts of debate on the story's message boards and in hate mail. There are people who honestly think I don't know that, technically, those are not words.
From: Gary
Greg it's "more wrong," not wronger.
See! And since you're all about the details, Gary -- my name is Gregg. Not Greg.
From: Chris
First the John Clay column, then the one on Aaron Rodgers, and now Tim Tebow? That's three straight columns where I completely agree with you. Hell is freezing over.
I am the apocalypse.
From: Dean H.
Have you seen the recruiting commitments Ohio State has for next year? Can you imagine what Terrelle Pryor would be like with a decent offensive line? You have a gift for understatement, sir.
Understatement? Me? No one's ever accused me of that before. Other words not used to describe me: subtle, unattractive, apocalypse..
From: Mike
Saw the Bob Knight dig in your Favre column. As always, when you scribble about Knight, your pink panties show.
What're you doing looking up my leg? You interested?
From: Lee
I heard your interview on the radio in Birmingham. I was very interested in what you were trying to say, but then the wheels fell off. Sorry -- Al Del Greco has his own agenda.
Nah, don't blame Al. That one's on me. I went back and listened to the podcast, expecting to hear something that would justify -- to me, anyway -- my tantrum. And there was nothing there. Strange. I lost it, and I lost it for no reason.
From: Josh
Al Del Greco would have been Jim Everett to your Jim Rome. In case you're too stupid to figure that one out, you'd have gotten your ass kicked ... by a kicker.
Let's not get delusional.
From: Chris
I took a break from my job to read through your hate mail. I'll never understand why people get so upset with you for doing what you were hired to do. Thanks for the laughs, and please continue with the hate mail.
Must have been a long break from your job. Last week's hate mail was enormous. Longest ever. So virile, so masculine, so ... wait a minute. We are still talking about hate mail, right?
From: CT Hoosier
I was starting to think you forgot about me.
Never. And I have the restraining order to prove it.
From: Jason Finn
McGriddles? I just vomited a little in my mouth ... and swallowed it. At least it wasn't a McGriddle.
Too bad. I bet a McGriddle tastes almost as good the second time around.
From: Pete
I was OK with your gibberish about the next vice president being an idiot, and with the idea that Kimbo Slice is bad for MMA. I agreed right up until you trashed Royce Gracie. For him to do what he did against guys who outweighed him by 40-50 pounds is one of the great feats of modern sport. To call him "one-dimensional" proves you don't really know what you're talking about.
Other than jiu-jitsu, Royce Gracie can't do anything. Nothing. Zero. One dimension plus zero other dimensions equals one dimension, my arithmetic-deficient friend.
From: Nina R.
I find it weird that some fighters lick their fingers, then rub their nipples before they fight. Like GSP and Rashad Evans. Why do they do that?
Same reason they shave their body hair and put tats everywhere and paint their toenails. Fighters are out there.
From: Rick
You are a piece of trash. I think it's time that you look for another job, you heartless little worm.
You have to let me know what column set you off. I can't fully enjoy your anger unless I know its cause.
From: Billy
Get to the point, jackass! Reading your article is like watching grass grow. Do you get paid by the word? If not, you should take a local writing course. One day you might become a good writer. God bless.
God bless? Oh pretty please can I join your church? Because your letter has me thinking, "My goodness, I want some of what he has." God bless ... what an absolute turd you are.
From: Mitchell Klein
Your writing is mediocre, as most of your columns consist of poorly thought-out ramblings. And you are the only sportswriter I specifically seek out to read. Why? Because everyone else sucks. Reilly is indeed unreadable. Simmons was good years ago, but now? Feh. My question is, how is this possible? With millions of sports fans and millions of college graduates looking for a job, how can YOU be the only sports columnist worth reading?
I want to be offended. I also want to kiss you. But I will not take the bait and chime in on any other columnist. CBSSports.com is no place for writer-on-writer crime.
From: Max
In the Tebow column, that shot at Rick Reilly was great.
OK, maybe one little misdemeanor.
