Updated Dec. 4
This is what happens when I try to be nice: I fail miserably.
My story from Alabama's 36-0 victory against Auburn applauded the Tide's domination and the juggernaut that Nick Saban was building. I also opined that Alabama can't beat Florida in the SEC title game on Saturday.
Guess which part of the story Alabama fans obsessed over?
And guess what else they seem to be obsessed with there in Alabama? Read on. But shield your children's eyes -- please.
From: Jeff M.
F--got.
Am I the subject or the object in that sentence fragment? And if I'm the object, what verb do you propose doing to me, Jeff?
From: Bryan H.
Will you promise to shave off that gay-looking beard and ditch the metrosexual glasses if Alabama beats Florida next week?
I picture you hitting the "send" button to this e-mail, leaning back and smirking. And then telling all your friends in 10th-grade algebra. I took algebra in the eighth grade, by the way. In Mississippi. Where we thanked God for Alabama.
From: Chris P.
Roll Tide, queer.
It's rolling, baby.
From: Chad Cobb
Wow, you're just a class act. My 8-year-old son asked me why this guy used the word "asses."
When your son is old enough to think for himself, he'll wish I was his father.
From: Jeffrey H.
I'm sure you have a bright future in journalism with such choice words like "asses kicked" in your award-winning articles. Your editor should be slapped for letting you print words like that.
Sorry, Jeff. Didn't know you were so dainty. May I suggest another website for you to peruse?
From: ARTHUR LONG
I read with interest your article, laced with vulgarity and certainty, about Lane Kiffin.
Vulgarity? I used the word "ass." Vulgarity. Oh brother. I need some tougher readers.
From: Omaha UM Fan
If Missouri was 11-1 and crushing everybody in sight, hacks like you would be griping about Oklahoma having to play an extra title game.
And if you were taller, smarter and better looking, you'd be me. What's your point?
From: ARTHUR LONG
As you are a public figure, I would be interested in your qualifications, sports history, professional experience, and success as measured by worth, i.e. salary or income, in order to assess your credibility.
Jeez, Art, I don't know. Suffice it to say my IQ is higher than yours, my salary is larger and my abs are more defined. Now riddle me this: What does it say about you that the only words you choose to write in all caps are your name? Narcissist much?
From: Thomas B.
Lauren Shehadi said you're getting soft, and I laughed because my mind was lounging in the gutter. Mr. Softie. The Softman.
If this were anyone else, TB, I'd go postal on you. But you, I like. As for Ms. Shehadi ... hmph.
From: Brian
Koach K may have won a gold medal, but his ardent support of Bush and Dole outweighs that by a lot. Please don't try to say that BLOG phrase. Koach K is good for America. He is not.
I'm saying he won the gold medal for the United States. That's all I'm saying. What are YOU saying?
From: CT Hoosier
Doyel's Dribbles returns! Please don't ever leave us again.
I'm back, baby. Until I'm gone again. I'm lazy unpredictable like that.
From: Kenny E.
Way too many people agreeing with your Big 12 column. You're edge is definitely gone. Giving up now. I'm a Freeman fan.
Talk about throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Wait, that makes ME the baby. I think Freeman should be the baby. Anyway ... the bathwater is dirty.
From: J.C. Michelson
Dan Quayle is smarter and richer than you. Show him the respect he deserves. He is chairman of an international division of Cerberus Capital Management, a multibillion-dollar private equity firm, and president of Quayle and Associates. He is an Honorary Trustee Emeritus of the Hudson Institute and ...
Enough, J.C. Enough. I get it. You're a Republican who loves everything on the right. You're everywhere, and you're the problem with this country.
From: Dana B.
If college basketball had a high commissioner, he'd consider banning this clown from Loyola, for detracting from the integrity of the game. Maybe next game against a good ballplayer, he'll have his 12th man on the bench poke the opposition's star in the eye to detach his retina and keep him from being on the court at all.
Don't give Jimmy Patsos any ideas.
From: Brian K.
I think I can speak for everyone when I say that I am quite disappointed knowing you didn't take my advice to tape a knife into a door and run into it.
A knife, jutting out, penetrating me ... such sexual imagery to be written from one man to another.
From: Scotty K.
If I wanted to get paid for being a whore, I'd become a prostitute; If I wanted to get paid big for being a jerk--- with a worthless opinion, I'd become a sportswriter.
As a sportswriter, nobody wants to hire you. As a prostitute, nobody wants to sleep with you. Maybe you could get a job with this next guy.
From: Slade
Saying that Alabama will get their "asses beat" is so disrespectful. I might say they have no chance, but never "asses beat." If I was your boss, this would have been your last article you would have written.
But if you were my boss, I'd be jerking sodas at the movie theatre and plotting a way to overthrow you at the popcorn machine.
From: Matthew
I appreciate your complete and total lack of class in writing an article about the Iron Bowl that is nothing more than a very thinly veiled shot at Alabama. I can only hope that crow tastes good next week.
Not sure how you do it in Alabama, but where I grew up we didn't eat crow at the holidays. We ate turkey. And as I've said, I grew up in Mississippi.
From: Byron T.
You, my friend, are a moron. The Tide will prove that come next Saturday. Have fun eating crow.
You people in Alabama are starting to make me wonder about crow. What do you think -- Miracle Whip or barbeque sauce?
From: Gerald T.
You may be right. 'Bama may well lose to the Gators. However, I don't think you know as much about 'Bama football, Nick Saban, the SEC or 'Bama tradition as you think you do. You see, Florida's tradition began in the 1990's. 'Bama's began in the 1920's.
Those guys that played for 'Bama in the 1920s? They're almost all dead, Gerald. You see my point?
From: Bill C.
Make sure you read this, Doyel. Grow a sense of style, please. And can the smug, self-aggrandizing, elitist, smartass comments that you think are cute. None of us think you are cute, or funny, or most of the time even informative. You would wince if you knew how it was perceived by readers.
Oh, come on. I'm cute. And you know I'm cute.
From: Everrette
Grow a sense of style, please, and can the smug, self-aggrandizing, elitist, smartass comments that you think are cute and professional. None of us think you are cute, or funny, or most of the time even informative. You would wince if you knew how it was perceived by readers.
That's the exact same thing Bill Cole said. I'm only wincing at the freaking plagiarism going on within the Alabama fan base.
From: Walter
I do not think it is fair that you make comments on football purely based on the fact that your picture is a tell-all of how much of a homosexual you are.
Here we go again. What is it with Alabama football fans and homosexuality?
From: Corey
Instead of sucking the male appendage of Florida's football team, do some real studying and look up the history of the SEC championship between Florida and Alabama. Alabama 41, Florida 38 ... and take that to the bank.
I shudder to think what kind of "bank" you have in mind.
From: R. Gates
Over three months without a blog? C'mon man -- you're way too nasty to settle for venting in articles alone.
Just for you, I got nasty with Clemson football.
From: Mike
You write some of the worst drivel I have read on sport site. If your intention is to write a piece to start a dialogue, you fail miserably.
Mike, um ... this is a dialogue.
