Kansas fans are mad at me. I treated the players on their basketball team like grown men, and Kansas fans don't like it. They wanted me to treat the Jayhawks like little kids, apparently, and pat them on the head and give them orange slices after watching their listless, season-ending performance against Northern Iowa.
No can do. And you should know better, Kansas fans. When the Jayhawks win, you ask them for autographs, chant their names and in general treat them like superstars. But when they lose, they should be treated like little bitty children?
I don't think so. Kansas' players don't need to grow up -- Kansas' fans do.
Let's do Hate Mail. I'm pissed off.
From: Adam Bengtson
Go to hell Doyel. They're college kids for heaven sake. It's people like you in the media world that make it like cancer to this country. Quit criticizing kids. Easy to sit behind a desk and write your garbage.
Wrong -- it's NOT easy writing my garbage. I'm one of the top 25 internet sports writers in the country -- with my own Wikipedia page -- for a reason. And that reason is this: Garbage like mine ain't easy.
From: Jim Foster
Pretty mean-spirited story on the Kansas student athletes. Uncalled for abusive tone which was much less than one should expect from a first-rate outfit like CBS.
I should be fired. Those poor kids ...
Wow, you sure do have some issues. Unprofessional, feckless and bitter are words that came to mind when reading this drivel about Kansas' loss to Northern Iowa. How can you write that about college kids?
You guys want it both ways. Basketball players at Kansas are lizard-king gods of war when they win -- but they're "college kids" when they lose. Either way, you're an idiot.
You must really be tough to write something like that. Let me ask, Mr. Tough Guy -- have you ever been in their shoes? And why say that about college kids?
Both ways, you people. You're the Lindsay Lohan of fan bases.
From: Jeff Amack
Your recent writing regarding the KU-NIU game is a little rough on the KU student-athletes.
Or the Cary Grant.
From: Frank B.
Leave those kids alone. You belong on Shutter Island.
From: Chalk Hawk
Would you want someone to write that about your kids?
And with the Ted Haggard reference, I think I've said enough. I'm done with that whole topic.
If I was in prison and could choose just one cell mate, I would choose you.
I said I'm DONE with that whole topic.
What a country we live in. How does an effeminate, non-sports-playing douche like you get a job as a sports writer? Amazing. You should really stick to OMG stuff or interior decorating.
Ironically, my high school baseball coach was, and still is, named Bubba. I was an all-state first baseman (1987) for him as a junior. And an all-state center fielder (1988) as a senior. Hey, you brought it up. And thank you so much!
From: Lord Bdub
You're a piece of s--- for making fun a group of kids for crying because they lost a game they've been passionate about all their life. I'm willing to bet that YOU never played basketball or any other sport at a high competitive level.
I was also all-state in soccer (1986). Look -- he called me out. Left me no choice. Plus he said he hated me ...
From: Lord BDUB, again
Now that's just crazy talk.
From: Kenny E.
I'm almost sad Kansas is out because now there will be no more Elmer Fudd references via Twitter from you.
Yup. That's all, folks.
From: Collin Prentiss
You should be embarrassed with your article. I know KU got outplayed and didn't deserve to win. Do you honestly think the team is crying for publicity? They are crying because it means so much to them, whether they tried hard or not. Frankly, you are an embarrassment to mankind.
Your name is an anagram for "nostril pencils."
From: Gene Russell
I am very, very disappointed in your bad taste in using toilet vulgarity in your column. What next, the S-word? Get hold of yourself, man. Children use the Internet.
I printed out your e-mail and tinkled on it.
You must not be a true college fan to realize the passion and dedication it is to be a part of a program such as KU. We had an amazing run this year winning the Big 12. We are all proud of our 'Hawks and once again go f--- yourself.
Looked you up, Janae. You went to Wichita State, not Kansas. Could you not get into Kansas? Is it even that hard? Or are you just a front-running homer? Either way, that's sad, Janae. Plus they're just kids.
From: Nick Sarcone
Seriously, what do you and Dennis Dodd have against the state of Iowa? Never have anything good to say about an Iowa team. Christ, UNI just knocks off the overall No. 1 seed and you can't even give them a little props for playing their assess off. You're pathetic.
Not fair. I can't speak for
that Iowa-hating knucklehead Dodd, but I personally hand-delivered a major award to Iowa State a few years ago. Here's the clip. It's my best work ever on film. People think James Cameron got screwed at Oscar time? Wrong. I got screwed.
From: J. Griffiths
Don't you think you could have expressed your ideas about graduation rates without denigrating intelligence? You turned a Tweed jacket into an insult, and it's just not necessary. Don't sound so mean-spirited. Express your ideas in a civilized manner.
I picture you with high-water pants and a pocket protector. Thanks.
UNI had the best shooter, UNI had the biggest guy, UNI played the best defense, UNI had the better coach. Your article was absurd, sir.
You're right. Ninth-seeded Northern Iowa, considered roughly the 35th-best team in the tournament, beating No. 1 overall seed Kansas was no upset at all. Good thing for you, Randall, is I'll never accuse you of wearing tweed. Ever. Sad thing is, you're not smart enough to understand I just insulted you ... although I bet you understood this sentence.
From: Jonathan Canoe
You know I love you, right? Because, man, your article on Grad Rates looks silly next to what Jay Bilas has been quoted as saying the past few days. He says set a graduation rate, and schools will find a way to meet it. We need to talk about education, not grad rates. So in addressing the same issue with pretty much the same response, you come across all Vic the Brick and Jay looks like Vin Scully. I'm rootin' for you my friend, but you were seriously outgunned in this one.
If your point is that Jay Bilas is smarter than me, well, that's not exactly breaking news. He's also taller. Probably better looking too. But before I get depressed, I am willing to guarantee I have a better body. Just ... 10 inches less of it. In height, people. In height.
From: Boiler Bill
Hey genius, where is that crappy Purdue team playing on Friday? You know, the one you predicted would get ousted in the first round. I'm sick and tired of all the Purdue haters in the media.
Purdue haters? There are no Purdue haters. That's like hating the color beige. Who hates beige? Who even spends time thinking about beige?
I'm doing a college English paper on Bryce Harper. What is your opinion on Bryce's physical development -- will it last or will he get burned out? Any other information regarding Bryce would be helpful. Thanks for your time.
I'm ignoring the fact that I think you're baiting me, and I will answer your query like so: I said everything about Bryce Harper that anyone, ever, will need to say in this column last summer. Plus I bet your college professor is a tweed-wearing egghead. But if he wants my autograph, he can have it.