Attack of the Barbaro-ians makes no (horse) sense

Merry Christmas Sweet Barbaro. All of us who love you got the best gift I can think of: you getting better each day. I still get goose bumps when I look at pictures of you. You are truly amazing and I love you dearly.

Merry Xmas, Barb, my love! U r always in my thoughts, day and night, night and day. I will leave out some carrots in case u want to stop by 2nite. Xoxo

The writer of that last note might not have been kidding. Right now, one of the big stories in Australia revolves around a 35-year-old woman caught frolicking in the nude with a horse. In public. She was charged with bestiality, with being "engaged in an indecent act with a horse." The (allegedly) molested horse wasn't Barbaro, but maybe he should be fitted with a chastity belt before someone takes advantage of his good nature.

Back in these United States, a quick message board search found one concerned woman who asked Barbaro the following question:

Sweet Barbaro: I just read that when you move to a "sunnier" location, it will not be made public. ... If so, does that mean we will not be able to e-mail you?

Barbaro has brought out the best in veterinary medicine but the worst in our hero-worshipping society. It's bad enough when an adult stakes out a hotel lobby for an autograph from an indifferent millionaire athlete.

But idolizing a horse? A creature that doesn't know you exist ... and doesn't know he's a horse? People are weird.

And it's about to get worse. Next year, Equus is going to be recreated in London. The lead will be played by another object of sick infatuation, Daniel Radcliffe -- better known as Harry Potter.

When all hell starts to break loose in Europe, remember this: They eat horses over there.