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Blog Entry

Funny Haha Maybe Sort of Kinda

Posted on: January 18, 2008 2:21 pm
Edited on: January 18, 2008 2:22 pm
 
  • A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. Afterward, he asked her how she liked the game.

    "I liked it, but I couldn't understand why they were killing each other for 25 cents," she said.

    "What do you mean?" he asked.

    "Well, everyone kept yelling, 'Get the quarter back!'"
  • A man walks into a bar with a dog. The bartender says, "You can't bring that dog in here."

    "You don't understand," says the man. "This is no regular dog, he can talk."

    "Listen, pal," says the bartender. "If that dog can talk, I'll give you 100 bucks."

    The man puts the dog on a stool, and asks him, "What's on top of a house?"

    "Roof!"

    "Right. And what's on the outside of a tree?"

    "Bark!"

    "And who's the greatest baseball player of all time?"

    "Ruth!"

    "I guess you've heard enough," says the man. "I'll take the 100 in 20s."

    The bartender is furious. "Listen, pal," he says, "get out of here before I belt you."

    As soon as they're on the street, the dog turns to the man and says, "Do you think I should have said DiMaggio?"
  • A man steps up for a tee shot with a row of trees on his right side. He slices it wildly and it heads off in the direction of the trees. He gets another ball and continues playing. About 15 minutes later a highway patrolman approaches him.

    "This your ball?" asks the policeman.

    "Yes, I think it is."

    "Well," says the officer, "it went over the trees and through the window of a house. It hit a cat and the cat ran out the front door. A school bus was driving by at the time and the driver, while trying to miss the cat, hit a tree. The bus exploded in flames, and there were no survivors."

    "Gee, I'm sorry.'' said the golfer. “Is there anything I can do?"

    The policeman replied, "Well, you might try keeping your left arm a little straighter and start your downswing with your hips."

-nay-

Category: General
Comments

Since: Aug 27, 2006
Posted on: January 19, 2008 3:20 pm
 

Funny Haha Maybe Sort of Kinda

A pastor, a doctor and an engineer were becoming very impatient with a slow group of golfers ahead of them. "What's with these guys," the engineer grumbled. "We've been waiting for at least 15 minutes."

"Ineptitude," the pastor replied. "Here comes the greens keeper. Why don't we have a word with him."

"George, what's up with the group ahead of us? They're pretty slow, aren't they?"

"Oh, yes," the greens keeper replied, "they're a group of firefighters. Sadly, they lost their sight saving our clubhouse from a fire a year ago, so we always allow them to play for free anytime."

"That is sad," the pastor said. "I will be sure to say a special prayer for them tonight."

"Excellent idea," the doctor said. "I'll contact an ophthalmologist buddy of mine and ask if there's anything he can do for them."

"Why can't these guys play at night?" said the engineer.




Since: Aug 27, 2006
Posted on: January 19, 2008 2:59 pm
 

Funny Haha Maybe Sort of Kinda

It was a sunny Saturday morning, and Mike was beginning his pre-shot routine, visualizing his upcoming shot when a voice came over the clubhouse speaker -"Would the gentleman on the Ladies tee please back up to the men's tee!"

Mike was still deep in his routine, seemingly impervious to the interruption. Again the announcement - "Would the man on the women's tee kindly back up to the men's tee! Please!"

Mike had had enough. He turned and shouted, "Would the announcer in the clubhouse kindly shut up and let me play my second shot!"




Since: Sep 28, 2007
Posted on: January 19, 2008 3:35 am
 

Funny Haha Maybe Sort of Kinda

I once heard about a cannibal who passed his friend in the woods


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