Blog Entry

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

Posted on: December 13, 2010 1:37 pm
Edited on: December 13, 2010 6:05 pm

The new Big Ten has 12 teams and will start every season with two Ls.

If this has you confused, it's meant to in the new Large Dozen. The Big Ten made a big deal Monday out of revealing the names of its two six-team divisions. Then it underwhelmed us. The divisions are named Leaders and Legends. Not to be confused with Dungeons and Dragons or Abbott and Costello.

Leaders Division:  Illinois, Indiana, Ohio State, Penn State, Purdue, Wisconsin

Legends Division:  Iowa, Michigan, Michigan State, Minnesota, Nebraska, Northwestern

"There's nothing, maybe, like it out there," Big Ten commissioner Jim Delany said.

That's certainly true. With all the great history and tradition available to it, the haughty Big Ten went low brow, corporate, generic. Leaders and Legends? That's the name of the trophy store down the street. What were "Gods" and "Superheroes" already taken? One thing for sure: The league won't be getting any cease and desist letters from famous people unless it's this guy. Sign ups are now being taken for summer school classes just to memorize the members of each division.

"Maybe if people don't embrace it in the first hour," Delany said, "they will in the first 24 or 36."

It's likely to take longer, if ever. If you're like me you're already wondering how the league promotes a Leaders Division showdown between Purdue and Indiana. It also prompts the question: Are the Leaders not legends and the Legends not leaders? And the alliteration thing is about as clever as a handoff to Archie Griffin. Delany was asked if the "two Ls" thing won't be associated with losses.

"You're the first one who has mentioned it," Delany said.

Apparently the commish wasn't on Twitter Monday which blew up with general mockery and disgust. A firm no doubt got six figures to "consult" on the division names and new logo. You'll love that when you see it. The league was cute with its embedded "11" in the old logo. In the new one, the "I" in "Big" has turned into "1". The "G" is meant to kind of simulate a "0". Maybe, but the "G" also looks like a "6". The league might be sending us a Da Vinci Code message on its future expansion plans.

"Now that you mention it ...," Delany said of a possible interpretation of "Big 16" in the new logo.

What is this a trademark or an M.C. Escher print?

All those names, all those (lower-case) legends and the league completely blew it. Schembechler and Hayes divisions would have been perfect. If Delany was worried about favoring individuals, then consider none of what went on Monday would have been possible without Bo and Woody enhancing the brand.

Instead the league used some of those people names for its conference awards, hyphenating them to get as many leaders and legends into the mix as possible. That makes the league's major awards look like chick-flick characters from your basic Lifetime movie. Who can forget Meredith Baxter-Birney playing Colleen Stagg-Paterno in "Looking For Love in Iowa City"?

My take on the subject wouldn't be complete without a list of suggested division names from myself and Twitter followers earlier on Monday. We got your generic right here.


Since: Dec 27, 2008
Posted on: December 13, 2010 5:48 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

I think they should have went with the Red and Blue divisions and they could have a Donkey and an Elephant as logos and could have the winner of each game vote Democratic or Republican in the next following election

Since: Oct 17, 2008
Posted on: December 13, 2010 5:45 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

I vote for the Pitchers and the Catchers... 

Since: Dec 4, 2010
Posted on: December 13, 2010 5:27 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

Paterno has been great....BUT....PSU has been in the BIG 10/11/12 long enough to sit along side Woody and Bo.  Maybe they should welcome in  Nebraska with a Devaney or Osborne spot next to JoePa?   Delaney blew this one! 

Since: Oct 11, 2009
Posted on: December 13, 2010 4:36 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

It almost sounds like a college theme party. "Secret Agents and Bond Girls", "Celebrities and Sports Stars"

Since: Mar 11, 2008
Posted on: December 13, 2010 4:25 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

If they wanted to be alliterative how about something classic with a product placement income stream.  Something like the Cocoa Division and the Krispies Division.

Since: Jun 11, 2009
Posted on: December 13, 2010 4:07 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

Let's see......Delaney killed the Big Ten in the Boardroom with the pen.  Does he have a Clue?  This is worse than RRod saying "We've got some work to do on defense."  I'm a Michigan fan wondering, "What Would Bo Do?"  He'd crap allover the names.

Call them east and west, and admit that you know nothing about geography.  It's more believable.

Since: Dec 1, 2006
Posted on: December 13, 2010 3:51 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

Nobody is forgetting about the division names, especially ones this lame. How can a conference still continue to use the Big Ten in it's in name when it no longer is even the same conference it was when they started. If they were really staying true with history and tradition, there wouldn't have been an 11th and 12th teams in this conference.  Not only is the design a childish, classroom scribble, but the division names are a complete joke.

Since: Mar 17, 2010
Posted on: December 13, 2010 3:34 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

stop the presses, for once i actually agree with something dodd wrote.  normally his inane blather isn't worth the time it takes my computer to load one of his crayon-written diatribes, but today we agree. 

the new logo and the division names are utter garbage.  the trophy name idea is ok, i guess, but naming the championship trophy after a guy whose school hasn't been in the conference for almost 3/4 of a century and a guy whose best coaching days occured before joining the conference is ridiculous.

delaney should be embarrased for this tripe.

Since: Nov 28, 2007
Posted on: December 13, 2010 3:08 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

As an active Dungeons & Dragons Elf Lord, I am offended to be lumped into this article about the Big Ten!

I cast a spell on Ye All!!!

Since: Feb 14, 2008
Posted on: December 13, 2010 2:50 pm

Dungeons, Dragons and Big Ten divisions

Just another Dennis Dodd rip on the Big 10.  DD's opinion has been bought and paid for by SEC money.

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