The Yankees reduced the prices on their most expensive tickets this week, to $1,250 from $2,500. Whoo-hoo! Now I'm waiting for word that the team will refund a portion of that after games in which its bullpen pitches.
On the other hand, for the price of just one of these primo, $1,250, behind-the-plate tickets, you can:
• Fly from New York to Miami ($429) on Monday, May 4 for the opening of the Marlins' two-game series with Cincinnati, returning to New York on May 6, and buy seven infield box-seat tickets ($52) for each night. If you don't want to sleep on the street, you may want only, say, four tickets to each game so you have enough money left for a hotel room.
• Invite your friends to Mickey Mantle's Restaurant and Sports Bar on Central Park South in Manhattan, where you could wolf down 83 grilled steak burgers.
• Become a Sustaining Member of New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art, which includes free admission for a full year plus other perks. Then buy a second Sustaining Membership for your wife, husband, boyfriend, girlfriend, best friend. ...
• Buy 46 copies of The Yankee Years, by Joe Torre and Tom Verducci.
• Pick up three lifetime subscriptions from TiVo.
• Score five tandem skydiving jumps on Long Island.
• Order 104 Papa John's XL X-Treme cheese pizzas.
• Buy 113 "cheap seat" tickets ($11) to see the Yankees play the Minnesota Twins in the Metrodome on July 7
• Reward six friends with a full year's subscription to Netflix (three discs at a time!).
• Scoop up 96 copies of Bernie Williams' compact disc Moving Forward.
• Make that 12 autographed copies of Bernie Williams' CD Moving Forward.
• Order 12 vintage Farrah Fawcett red bathing suit posters.
• Meet Moxie at the Bronx Zoo and introduce her to your entire family because, for your $1,250, you can purchase eight family memberships to the Bronx Zoo, which gives you admission to that, the Central Park Zoo, the Queens Zoo, the Prospect Park Zoo and the New York Aquarium for an entire year. Sparky Lyle not included.
• Pick up a Panasonic Viera 50-inch plasma television ($989.99), and still have enough money left over for an 8-gigabyte iPod touch.
• Visit the Babe Ruth Birthplace Museum in Baltimore 207 times on an adult admission ($6).
• Order the complete Seinfeld DVD series, seasons 1-9 ($213.34), the complete Friends DVD series ($269.99), the complete Sopranos ($339.99) and The Wire (199.99) from BarnesandNoble.com, and still have more than $200 left for microwave popcorn.
• Put a downpayment on your spot at the Yankees Fantasy Camp ($5,500) this winter in Tampa, Fla.
Dislikes: Sure hope Koji Uehara's bruised sternum heals quickly. Scary moment Thursday when the Angels' Gary Matthews Jr. drilled him with a line drive. ... The woman -- or guy -- next to me on the elliptical machine at the gym who gabs on her -- or his -- cell phone non-stop.
Rock 'N' Roll Lyric of the Day:
"Well there's reasons for that
"And there's reasons for this
"I can't think of any now but I know they exist
"I'm sittin in the sun till my skin turns brown
"I just want to say that hell's my wife's home town"
-- Bob Dylan, My Wife's Home Town