Blog Entry

Funniest AP story ever?

Posted on: April 14, 2009 12:04 am
Edited on: April 14, 2009 12:08 am

Regardless of whether you're interested in Connecticut, you must read Monday's AP story on Hasheem Thabeet.


The 7-foot-3 center -- who officially remains undecided about whether to enter the NBA Draft -- spent the weekend in Miami, updating his Twitter account from courtside of a Heat game and an upscale restaurant (among other places) while giving the AP some great material for perhaps the funniest straight news story I've ever read.

At The Forge For Dinner!!! I didn't know food could be so expensive.... Ahhhh LOL!! Enjoyin MIAMi tho.. Fancy Life, Fancy Cars.... Mhmmm.

According to the AP, that was one of Thabeet's "tweets."

Here's another:

Swagga On A Zillion... Oewwwwww!!!! MIA-yooo Lets Go!!!!

That "tweet" was posted Sunday at 2:30 a.m.

I'm going to assume alcohol was involved.

If not, there's no excuse.

"He is definitely going to meet with the coach over the next couple of weeks," said UConn spokesman Kyle Muncy, who must hate his job at this point -- thanks to Jim Calhoun's health, Nate Miles' agent and Thabeet's adventures.

As for Thabeet's upcoming meeting with Calhoun, it should be brief and conclude with Calhoun insisting the sure-bet lottery pick get as far away from campus as possible, as soon as possible. Remember, to play college basketball you have to be an "amateur", and unless Thabeet has more expendable cash than any Tanzanian I know (actually, I don't know any Tanzanians outside of Thabeet, but you get my point) then there's no way his amateur status is still intact. Honestly, the notion is laughable, especially when you consider that Miles reportedly had an agent before he ever stepped on UConn's campus. So even if Thabeet now had a sudden urge to play one more year in the Big East, Connecticut couldn't afford to let him given the weekend's developments combined with the fact that the NCAA is already looking into allegations of impropriety within the basketball program.

In other words, as Cheese might say , Thabeet is gone, baby gone.

I suspect he'll be tweeting about it any minute.


Since: Apr 10, 2007
Posted on: April 14, 2009 9:48 am

Funniest AP story ever?

Actually, the funniest AP story I ever read didn't even last on the wire very long.  It involved the former Russian President Boris Yeltsin at a time in the late 90s when his behavior was very erratic and most people just assumed it was because he was an alcoholic.  Which may indeed have been the case, but it's also come out since his death that he may have suffered from some neurological disorders and moreover was possibly being given strong and untested medications from Kremlin doctors.  Anyhow, that's not the funny part of the story that didn't last too long.  Yelstin was making an official visit to some European country, I think either Bulgaria or Hungary.  When his plane landed, he was greeted by a delegation and a press corps.  He then proceeded to bearhug the premier of the country and immediately challenged him to a wrestling match right there on the tarmac.  The AP writer's deadpan style only made the depiction of the incident more hilarious.  I think Yeltsin was quickly escorted away by various staffers and aides.  A frend of mine from college sent me the text of the story overnight in an email but the finished version that hit the wires and most papers was a short brief about Yeltsin simply falling ill while away from Moscow.  It would like knowing what happened to Stanley Wilson at Super Bowl XXIII and writing that he missed the game due to flu-like symptoms!

Since: Apr 17, 2007
Posted on: April 14, 2009 7:04 am

Funniest AP story ever?

Thabeet will be another UConn lottery pick. He has handled himself well throughout his college years. Athletes should be wary of YouTube, Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter. When will they learn? Remember, potential NBA lottery picks: If it doesn't make dollars it doesn't make much sense! 

Since: Nov 19, 2006
Posted on: April 14, 2009 12:46 am

Funniest AP story ever?

Parrish is absolutely dead on with this. There is no hope in hell of Thabeet coming back now. WAY to much would come into question about whether his amateur status is still good and it just seems completely unlikely. He also is probably really digging the NBA lifestyle and likes being able to spend cash like that whenever he wants. See ya Thabeet. Even as a Duke fan I was hoping he'd return. Good players make college basketball more interesting.


Since: Mar 14, 2009
Posted on: April 14, 2009 12:11 am

Funniest AP story ever?

He would be nuts to stay. 

I'm sure he won't once the Grim NCAA Reaper calls upon UCONN.

Peace Thabeet, in your native accent " Nice Know Yaoooooo! "

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