Posted on: September 26, 2011 6:47 pm
Edited on: September 27, 2011 12:09 am
D.P. Wire Report 9/26/11 1:23p.m.
After being called upon to help look at what caused the December 2010 collapse of the Metrodome after heavy snowfall in the Minneapolis area, students of the University of Minnesota School of Engineering are now being brought in to help fix the collapse of the stadium's NFL tenants. Back in December, Minnesota Engineering students were flabbergasted that the design of the roof not only encouraged the accumulation of snow rather than sloping it off the building, but also lacked heaters to help aid in the melting of said frozen precipitation. When pointed out that the building was designed by Miami, Fl based Bob's Discount Dome Builders, 5th year senior Matthew Easterling said, "Well there you go. I mean, don't they realize this is Minneapolis? It's not like snow is a rare occurrence up here. I can't believe they didn't design a way to stop snow from accumulating. A 10 year old could figure that out. This place was a time-bomb waiting to go off one winter." "I'm so very proud of my students," engineering professor Boris Diedrich opined. "After being able to solve the mystery of what led to the roof collapse, they are now able to tackle the equally perplexing problem of what is wrong with my beloved Vikings." Asked by professor Diedrich to give their first thoughts as to what might be the problem, 72% of his students responded that Adrian Peterson's number of carries inexplicably drops by 50% in the second half. This is despite having anywhere from a 10 to 20 point lead in each of their 3 contests so far this season. When asked to explain the reduced second half workload of the Vikings workhorse, offensive coordinator Bill Musgrave offered, "You do realize that the NFL season is a marathon, not a sprint, correct? We're just trying to rest A.P. so that way he's fresh come playoff time. By limiting his workload now, he will be able to carry us through January. Just watch as Ryan Grant and Jahvid Best are overexerted, and the Packers and Lions start falling back to the rest of the pack." When pointed out by Jerry Paulson of the St. Paul Pioneer that it is a baseball season that is a marathon, and a football season is indeed a sprint, Musgrave retorted, "Are you sure?" Or, as Viking's season ticket holder Randall Gibbons claims, "I think Musgrave's doing a great job as offensive coordinator. Right now, there's not a team whose second half play is more repugnantly offensive than the Vikings." Another issue pointed to by a majority of professor Diedrich's class is the location of Percy Harvin on nearly 50% of the offensive snaps, which happens to be the same location he's in for 100% of the defensive snaps. As sophomore Emily Templeton wrote, "It's far easier for the other team to shut down your explosive playmakers when your own coaching staff is doing it for you." This sentiment was echoed by head coach and defensive coordinator of the Vikings week 2 opponent, Raheem Morris of the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. "Going into the Vikings game, the two people you have to gameplan for are Peterson and Harvin. So I told Aqib Talib, our best cornerback, I want you to be on Harvin 100% of the time. No matter where he lines up, you line up across from him. Well, on our very first series, I see him fronting the Vikings sideline and call a timeout. I'm like, 'Son, what are you doing. If you play like that, it'll be 11 on 10.' He retorted, 'Coach, you told me all week long to stick to Harvin like glue. Even if he's in the backfield, he's my responsibility. Well, he's over there next to (George) Stewart (Vikings Wide Receivers coach).' After checking that indeed only Michael Jenkins and Bernard Berrian were on the field, I apologized to Aqib and said, okay, when Harvin's not in the game, find the guy that doesn't have anybody on him. This allowed Talib to match up against guys with inferior speed and big play capabilities compared to Percy." Of course, it should also be pointed out that 28% of professor Diedrich's class suggested not having halftime and 13% answered limit the games to 30 minutes. When asked to the possibilities of these rule changes being introduced, ever, competition committee chairman Rich McKay of the Atlanta Falcons responded, "Between slim and none, and slim is one of none's orbiting electrons." All the D.P. knows currently, is after being down 3 games in the divisional standings after playing a grand total of 3 games, head coach Leslie Frazier's seat is currently warm enough to ensure snow won't be gathering upon the covering over Mall of America Field this season. Then again, keep up this stellar second half play, and Tim Leiweke will make sure the Vikings next home games will be in a place that sees little precipitation at all, much less snow.
Stay tuned tomorrow for the release of the D.P.'s Week 3 NFL Flop 10 Poll
Tags: Adrian Peterson, Aqib Talib, Atlanta Falcons, Bernard Berrian, Bill Musgrave, Coaching, Competition Committee, Detriot Lions, Golden Gophers, Green Bay Packers, Hot Seats, Jahvid Best, Leslie Frazier, Mall of America Field, Metrodome, Michael Jenkins, Minneapolis, Minnesota Vikings, NFL, Percy Harvin, Raheem Morris, Rich McKay, Ryan Grant, Tampa Bay Buccaneers, Tim Leiweke, University of Minnesota
Posted on: November 19, 2008 1:04 am
Edited on: November 19, 2008 10:13 pm
Yea! I'm posting on time! Just got back from the Lightning game (well not just, stopped by Iamyo's blog to vote on songs, first), so that's where I'll lead off after the big news coming down on Friday. And thank you NFL for making it very easy for me to come of with ten topics after what I thought was going to be a blah weekend (or curse you NFL for making me make some tough decisions to keep it to ten, depending on how you want to look at it).
1) So long, Mullet - No, this is not going to be a good-bye and good ridance point. Instead, this is going to be a rip owner Oren Clueless point. First off, you didn't give the man enough time. Despite the team's poor performances, they were only 6 points out of first at the time. Secondly, way to show some cajones (not). Great job letting the inmates run the asylum. Thirdly, it's absolutely beautiful that you are paying TWO coaches not to coach now. Guess Saw VI is already in production. Gotta get that money somewhere. Plus, it's not like the team is performing much better now that Melrose is gone. In the game tonight, I saw too much cross ice passing, no players in posistion for rebounds (which Vokoun gave up a ton on the FIFTY shots he faced), and a goalie who makes all the spectacular saves, but gives up the softest goals I've ever seen. Two of the Panthers three goals tonight were on shots from the blue line, and the third was a soft shot from in front of the net in which he was horribly off balance. Plus, he commits too early. That's why they lost in the shootout. If the one Panther player doesn't lose control, he would have allowed goals on both shots. Plus, why can't the Lightning players score in shootouts? This should be an area they excel in. This team has some major problems, and I don't think anybody in the organization knows how to fix them. Oh, and one more thing, why is St. Louis on the point on the power play? Did he develop a 100+ MPH slap shot I don't know about. His two greatest assets are his agility and his ability to steal the puck, and they are being wasted back there.
2) I always wondered what the "T" in the standings stood for - Just like Donovan McNabb, I had no idea NFL games could end in ties. I thought they settled it like soccer and lined up five receivers in the end zone, sent out one DB, and the QB had to see how many he could complete from the 20 yard line. If it was still tied after that, they back up the QB's five yards until one QB hits his receiver and the other doesn't. You are the leader of an NFL franchise. You have played this game for many years. And you didn't know one of the most basic rules???? A rule that was explained to you during the OT coin toss???? A coin toss you were present for as a captain of the team???? And you hope the Super Bowl doesn't end this way???? This is all absolutely inexcusible. This is the same QB and same head coach that faced a 10-6-1 Atlanta Falcons team in the 2003 playoffs (for the 2002 season) on their way to getting their butts handed to them by the better looking Barber twin. What the heck did they think the -1 stood for? That Atlanta suffered a rainout at some point? That they didn't have enough healthy players to continue one game? McNabb is a joke.
3) Caveat Emptor - Unfortunately, I didn't know the latin phrase for "Let the bettor beware." I couldn't believe (especially with today's economy) that $100 million was bet on the Steeler game against the Chargers. And because an NFL officiating crew outthought themselves and applied a proper rule improperly, and changed a correct call to an incorrect call, 2/3 of those millions were swept away into the Vegas economy (maybe the housing market out there will improve, now). Now, I have no sympathy for those that thought they had won and instead held a worthless ticket. There's always a chance of that when you gamble. My concern is, though, that these lost points MAY end up coming back in a tie breaker for the playoffs. Doesn't happen often, but I remember one year (I want to say 1998) where it did. It was a tie breaker between the Packers, Cowboys, and one other team. I remember hearing the experts breaking down how the Packers had a +8 differential while the Cowboys had a -24, so they had to make up 32 points, or whatever it was. Anyway, how is it that people that should INHERITANTLY knows the rules (players, coaches, referees) don't (or at the very least, apply them incorrectly). This is becoming appalingly scary. Thanks to the gaffe, though, it was the first 11-10 final in NFL history.
4) Um, say what? - Is there something in the water in Minnesota (maybe it's all them lakes) that makes people see things differently from the rest of us? First, there was a columnist for the Star-Tribune who called the offensive PI call on Bobby Wade near the end of the game questionable at best. Questionable at best? There was absolutely NO question about it. If he doesn't interfere with Aqib Talib, Talib has an easy pick. Fortunately, most of the people up there told him to take his homer glasses off. Now, Brad Childress comes out today and says that not only does he believe that DE Ray Edwards shouldn't be fined, but he thinks Jeff Garcia should have been flagged for intentional grounding. Um, coach, want to watch the replay again? You can do it without slow motion, since you said that's what was making people draw the conclussions they were drawing. First off, Edwards hit Garcia SECONDS (not a second, SECONDS) after he released the ball taking close to three steps to get there. That's the very definition of roughing, and has been for years. That was in the books long before all this driving into the turf, leading with the helmet, going low on a QB stuff began. And then he said Garcia should have been called for intentional grounding because he left the pocket, then went back in? Coach, you might want to check the rule book again. I don't think there's anything in there for that. Another case of someone who should know the rules who doesn't. No coach, you're more worried about Edwards possibly getting suspended, and being without your ENTIRE starting defensive line. Oh, and great play calling late in the game, too. Way to shut down the best RB in the league FOR US.
5) Keep on Rolling - No, I'm not talking about Alabama, who scared me to death in the first half before they woke up and took care of business in the second. I'm talking about the University of Florida Gators, who have just been on a phenominal tear since dropping the game to Ole Miss. After that game, Tim Tebow promised that you would never see anybody work harder, and he's lived up to it, with the rest of his teammates joining him. In the last three games, they have made three of the best defenses in the nation look silly. They force you to try to run gimmicks to beat them, as Spurrier did with the kickoff throwback that blew up in their face. In the Vandy game, the only way Vandy's defense got off the field in the first half was with the help of a blind replay booth. By the way, Florida has scored on all but two of its red zone trips this year, one on the aforementioned Harvin fumble that was a TD (or at the very least not a fumble), and one when they took a knee in the Tennessee game. That's SCARY effeciency. I know some of this is due to the SEC being down this year. Even as an SEC honk, I can admit it. This is mostly due to a huge drop in the QB play this year. But hey, they're still clearly the second best conference, without there even being a close third. Some down year.
6) A look back - Several weeks ago, I wrote this in my blog: Commodore 64's - If you were to suggest to Vanderbilt fans that this would be their record after 10 games this year, I'm sure most of them would have been ecstatic. Well, they'll have to go 1-4 during the next 5 in order NOT to top it. ... Well, they did only go one and four in their next five, but in doing so, secured the aforementioned 6-4 record and their first bowl game since 1982. Congrats Commodores, from a Gator.
7) Tiger scare - Does Troy have any concept on how to finish a game? You were up 31-10 going into the fourth quarter, and you allow LSU to drop a 30 spot on you in the quarter???? How on earth does this happen? More importantly, though, how does LSU get down 31-3 to a Troy to being with? Did the Bama game take that much out of you? Or did your coach just not perpare you for this team. I have no problems with Les Miles. I think he's a great coach. But when a team is unmotivated and/or unprepared, that falls squarely on the coach's shoulders, no matter what level of football it is.
8) Speaking of poor coaching ... - Who is the special teams coach for the Notre Dame Fighting Irish? If there was one going into the Navy game, there should not have been one coming out of the Navy game. How do you just stand around and watch what's going on, like they did on the second one. Allowing one onside kick is a fluke, allowing two is unforgivable. Way to hang on to win a game that, quite frankly, you deserved to lose. Doesn't seem like that hot seat cooled off too much for Charlie Weiss after that one.
9) Speaking of poor coaching ... - Yes, I know I just used this as the title to the previous point, but it fits here as well, especially when talking about an unprepared and/or unmotivated team. This time, I give you, the University of Ketucky basketball team. Did they really just lose to VMI, a year after coming off a loss to Gardner-Webb? Yes, I know upsets happen, but this level of upset should not happen to this storied of a team two years running. Kentucky at 18-11 no more deserved to be in the NCAA tournament last year than my Gators did, but one of them made it. And now they're well on their way to potentially not making it this year. And UK basketball fans, what's your deal? Gary Parish writes one little article about you that you don't like, and you go flying off the handle? I'll give you this link to one of my responses: http://www.sportsline.com/mcc/blogs
10) Weekend look ahead - The games I'm looking forward to this weekend are UF versus The Cit ... ah, who am I kidding? Give me Texas Tech Oklahoma, Ball State Central Michigan on Wednesday to see if they can remain undefeated (actually, Ball State might be wishing it was Michigan and not Central Michigan on their schedule), Penn State Michigan State, and in the NFL, New England Miami (who would have thought I'd be saying that after last year?), New York Giants Arizona, and Atlanta Carolina. As you can see, a fantastic weekend to make up for last one.
Tags: Aqib Talib, Berry Melrose, Bobby Wade, Brad Childress, Chargers, Charlie Weiss, Donovan McNabb, Gary Parrish, Gators, Hot Seat, Jeff Garcia, LSU Tigers, Martin St. Louis, Mike Smith, Minnesota Vikings, Navy, NHL, Notre Dame, Officiating, Onside Kicks, Overtime, Philadelphia Eagles, Poor Coaching, Ray Edwards, Roughing, Rules, SEC, Special Teams, Steelers, Tampa Bay Lightning, Ties, Troy, University of Kentucky, Vanderbilt Commodores