Posted on: May 28, 2010 8:20 pm

Capping the Gulf Gusher: A Nation's thanks to...

Today's entry came about from the amazing early season winning streak that launched the Rays to a 32 and 12 start, while in the Gulf of Mexico an out-of-control oil well blowout was threatening vast areas.  2 kinds of blowouts?.. or one?  Look for hidden word play.


Capping the Gusher in the Gulf:  A Nation's thanks to...

...The Boston Red Sox!   Their "top kill" procedure stuffed the gusher of wins from the Gulf this week and prevented the runaway disaster that threatened to pollute the summer season for months or worse.  A greatful nation thanks you for your timely heroism.  Your quick action and ingenuity is appreciated as you saved many endangered birds (e.g.: Orioles, Jays), and restored the delicate natural balance.

While I realize it may only be temporary, your blowout preventer held firm when BP's version failed miserably.  Better than the inept "old tires and golf balls" plan, your mix of rawhide, Garza spit, Youk sweat and a green monster capped the deluge and swept up the spill.  Beach parties all over cheer with relief.  Your closer may not yet be as famous as the patented "Mo", but props even from Jones Beach fans. 

The danger of the runaway cannot be overstated.  Dying competition, lost jobs, hopelessness, foreclosures, and the prospect of an empty August could be in sight.  And who knows?   Vital species would be at risk like Cardinals, Tigers, Marlins, and Cubs - native americans like Braves and Indians - as well as Mariners everywhere could have been drowned by the spreading slick.  No longer the devil, this outbreak must be contained and controlled - and the owners made to pay.

Paradoxically, tar balls have been found stuck to wildlife all over the Gulf, all except the annoyingly clean electric blue helmets on the heads of the very source of this flood!  Imagine another blacksocks scandal?  Whether you're part of a huge fanbase in a town so nice they named it twice, or riding with friends in a duckboat around a fine college town or even floating alone in a tidal inlet like Tampa Bay, Raise your voices!  Together we can stop this florid atrocity.

Are we safe now?   Not yet... unless we can keep the spill at bay and tamp down any leaks.  At least now, we have a ray of hope, thanks to the Back Bay boys, the rivals that the Big Apple knows and loves, the Bahhhston RedSox!

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