Tag:Tim Tebow Pastor
Posted on: December 12, 2011 2:38 pm
Edited on: December 13, 2011 10:34 am

Church of God, Church of Satan weigh in on Tebow

By Will Brinson

The Tim Tebow media saturation is in full swing Monday. And just in case you don't believe me, someone decided to ring up a preacher and ask him whether or not God is the cause of Tebow's success.

Yes, this "someone" is TMZ. How'd you know? (And the preacher is referred to as "one of Tim's Colorado pastors," although he isn't directly referred to as "Tim's preacher" which leads me to believe he is, in fact, not Tebow's preacher.)

"It's not luck," Hanson told TMZ Monday. "Luck isn't winning 6 games in a row. It's favor. God's favor."

Hanson added "God has blessed his work" and would Tebow be winning if he wasn't such a strong believer in God? Well, "of course not."

TMZ, wanting to get both sides of the story, also spoke with Magus Peter H. Gilmore, a high priest in the Church of Satan (we're not kidding). Gilmore points out that if God is helping Tebow that would mean he is actively ensuring the other team loses. 

Instead, Gilmore says that "Those who have a winning attitude tend to do better, and whatever fuels such team spirit, be it religious fervor or simply an overwhelming desire to succeed, is the real source for success."

He goes on to say, "Satanists are atheists, and we would consider any triumph to rely on a combination of skill and luck – most certainly not in any form of supernatural intervention from either Heaven or Hell."

Now, this makes for fun water cooler chatter and pageviews, but let's be clear: God is not intervening in Tebow's football career. God does not care more about Tim Tebow than God cares about Marion Barber.

Does Tim Tebow succeed because he has a strong faith in something that allows him to persevere in the face of adversity? That's absolutely a possibility. Does Tebow's faith and resolve strengthen those around him? Sure, that's called being a leader. Could this be the karmic rewards of Tebow's actions as a good human being paying him back in kind? If you want to think so, yeah.

But this ain't God staring omnipotently down at 22 men chasing an oblong leather ball, leaning in and flicking the ball out Barber's hands so Matt Prater can crush a long field goal to give the Broncos a regular season win in an NFL game.

God has lots of important things to do. One of them is not something that amounts to "fixing the outcome of football games."

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