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Category:NFL
Posted on: January 25, 2008 4:16 pm
Edited on: January 25, 2008 11:24 pm
 

Most People, Contrary To Many Beliefs, Bleed Red

Well one late night while looking at my sword-shaped letter opener and keyboard wrist pad, I found myself in a very deep version of a coma. As any even-minded human being would, i started making holes in the wrist pad. I found that the initial stab was simple, but it took at LEAST half of a muscle to pull it back out. That's when it donned on me. Stabbing someone would be hard if you were planning to do it more than once. I mean can you imagine how hard it'd be to yank a knife out of human flesh once much less 40-50 times in succession. Mass murderers actions cannot be condoned, but they certainly have to be respected. Those guys either had some good muscle mass or huge stones to be yanking that thing in and out over 25 times each night. Murderers are definitely good at what they do and we need to use that to our advantage. We send these guys out into the streets of Baghdad ala Alarik from Assassin's Creed and tell him to have at it. We send Mahoney-level officers along with him to make sure he kills true-blooded insurgents. These guys have trained themselves to kill, why not let him use their skill! Think about it, the insurgents are happy when the murderer eventually turns on the cops, and we're happy because he's slaughtering not-so-helpless Iraqi insurgents. Everyone wins.



Moral of The Story: Don't let your babies grow up to be Cowboys. Train them to kill instead. For the good of America.
Posted on: January 25, 2008 3:34 pm
Edited on: January 25, 2008 4:24 pm
 

My Plan For The Titans Offseason

1. Franchise Haynesworth until an agreement is made upon an incentive-laden contract for 4-6 years. (thank to drpeek2005 for the incentive revelation)

2.Sign D.J. Hackett after we bring him in. Mike Reinfeldt has already arranged a meeting at Baptist Sports Park so this may be old news, but i still think a nice vet like D.J. can help us out more than Eric Moulds did.

3.Release Brandon Jones and Chris Davis. A third year injury problem is not a good sign. Mike Williams showed promise with a Chow reunion but a Heimerdinger work ethic routine might work out better. I think he can be a nice WR if he snaps him into shape.

4.Re-Sign Ben Troupe to a 1-year deal. This kid was good in his rookie season... with guess who? Heimerdinger. If he can that potential back into talent like he had with Mike, we should have no problem at the TE position.

5.Look for another free agent OL like Ruben Brown, Alan Faneca, or Ryan Lilja. They'll be good competition for the guard spots which may be open with a possible Jacob Bell departure and/or Benji Olsen retirement.

6.Upgrade the opposite DL. If the Super Bowl-bound Giants can get things done with just 2 DE's imagine our dominance with that and Big Al in the center. Jared Allen is a nice prospect as well as DL Renaldo Wynn, Paul Spicer and Justin Smith.

7.Draft a WR (Malcolm Kelly or Limas Sweed) In the first round. Big guys like them with nice speed will get things done opposite a route runner like D.J. Hackett.

8.Don't neglect the RB Position! We were interested in Michael Turner before and we will be now. We'll be able to bring back out the 2RB sets we had when Henry was here. (Also a snippet from an article about our interest in him last year) "Agent Bus Cook said he hadn't had much time to talk with Turner, who was checking out of a Nashville hotel Monday afternoon. But he said Turner enjoyed his visit with the Titans." Obviously he likes us... and now we've got that Eddie George-like figure that was key to Heimerdinger's offense during what seemed to be our most recent glory days.

9. Second Round... LB? I think we should look deeply at MLB this year, but in the second round. We need competition to thin out the best of that position. Stephen Tulloch and Ryan Fowler were duking it out last preseason so why not bring someone else in who can be better.. THEN watch them try to play up to his level. They certainly don't want some rookie taking their job.

10. 3rd Round... Look at DL/OL depending on the talent at each line. I'd love to see a high-talent lineman around this pick and there's a deep class this year for it. At least i think so.

11.4th Round... Punter. Craig Hentrich is certainly not getting any younger and he was a good punter in his day. There isn't much grooming to do for a new punter, but we need to get one with a big leg. That way he'll take kickoff duties and not just ride the bench. He can also relieve Hentrich if for some reason our drive stalls out and so does Craig.

12. 5th-7th rounds... OL/DL Depth. We did a fairly good job at getting depth for the O-line this year but such a shallow group hurt us when injuries came last year.

13. Keep Pacman. The kid makes plays and if he stays out of trouble, great! If he doesn't, big deal. I'm not sure there's a lose here... We've done fine without him so he wouldn't be a huge loss if he were to leave the organization. We aren't exactly as needy for him as the Falcons were for Michael Vick.
Posted on: January 21, 2008 12:14 am
 

The Big Question In The Super Bowl....

Which one buys the lube?

Tom Coughlin better behind over and smile this sunday. There's no getting past these Patriots.
 
 
 
 
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