Bobby Abreu is ... not in a hurry

Has Bobby Abreu touched home plate yet? (AP)

As the body ages, it, of course, takes us longer to tend to our normal duties. In Bobby Abreu's case, that apparently means "rounding the bases after a home run."

Abreu, you see, launched a bomb in the Dodgers' game against the Rockies on Friday. He then circled the bags in a pace that can best be described as "leisurely to the point of satire." Over at Baseball Prospectus, Larry Granillo has, wonderfully and dutifully, tracked "trot times" for a number of seasons. Granillo notes that Abreu's glacial 31.56-second-trot is the "slowest non-injury related trot in the Tater Trot Tracker era."

As Granillo notes, Abreu's bat-flip and subsequent stroll might have been in response to getting buzzed earlier in the AB by Colorado hurler Will Harris ...

When you come out of the box in such a manner, you're well on your way to a record trot. So to Bobby Abreu we offer our ... congratulations?

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