On Friday, our loyal MLB editor here at CBSSports.com, the sinewy and lantern-jawed Ivan Irizarry, made the following tandem tweets:
Ugh. This has happened again... Career 162 game avg: Wily Mo: .250/.303.445 Juan Francisco: .253/.309.454— El Gran Iván (@theiri) August 16, 2013
Career 162 game average: Wily Mo 23 HRs, 65 RBIs, 151 Ks, 30 BB Juan Francisco 19 HRs, 65 RBIs, 139Ks, 30 BB— El Gran Iván (@theiri) August 16, 2013
Mr. Irizarry also passed along some accompanying photographic evidence:
Of his investigative efforts, Mr. Irizarry points out that he's "been doing this s**t since May."
Anyhow, yes, Brewers infielder Juan Francisco and former major-league fly-catcher Wily Mo Pena are unassailably the same person, in terms of both statistical footprint and visage.
So why is no one else talking about this? Because the Francisco-Mo-Pena-Industrial Complex has told them not to talk about it, that's why. But Mr. Irizarry, who lifts weights while wearing an ivory-jacket tuxedo, stands athwart the sinister wherever he finds it.