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New EOB Heavyweight Champions: The Tampa Bay Rays

By Dayn Perry | Baseball Writer

The Yanks are hanging their heads because the Rays ran off with the EOB Heavyweight Championship. (USATSI)
The Yanks are hanging their heads because the Rays ran off with the EOB Heavyweight Championship. (USATSI)

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On Saturday night, the Rays came from behind to top the belt-holding Yankees, and in doing so they laid righteous, blood-soaked claim to the Eye On Baseball Heavyweight Championship.

Wait, the "Eye On Baseball Heavyweight Championship"? What's that? That, readers, is this ...

Since the concept of championship belts is cool in boxing, MMA and sports entertainment (aka pro wrestling), the Eye on Baseball team has decided to create a Heavyweight Championship belt for the 2013 season.

As the defending World Series champions, the Giants entered the season with the strap. From there, here are our rules.

1. A team must win a series from the champion to take the belt. One game isn't going to cut it, considering it's a 162-game season and teams all view the season in terms of series.

2. If the belt-holder splits a series (two- or four-game series), it retains. Much like on a draw in boxing or a count-out situation in pro wrestling, you don't get the belt unless you actually beat the champion. A tie isn't good enough.

3. If, at the end of the regular season, the belt-holder does not make the playoffs -- and due to the dynamics of this thing, that scenario is entirely plausible -- said team will be stripped of the title for not qualifying for the postseason. Then the winner of the playoffs -- the World Series -- takes the belt and the title into the offseason.

So how did the Rays manage to take the strap from the Yankees? In high-level grappling terms, they body-slammed the living crap out of them and then pinned them. Check out this official high-definition game footage ...

As mentioned, you can see that the Rays first body-slammed the crap out of the Yankees and then pinned those same Yankees for the three-count. And that's how the belt and the title changed hands!

With that, let us check in on our Roll Call of Champions ...

Up next for the Rays is the utterly meaningless series finale against the Yanks on Sunday followed by a single make-up game against the Royals on Monday. Our official ruling? Yes, that single game against the Royals is a loser-leave-town match, and at stake will be ... the Eye On Baseball Heavyweight Championship. Tuned is where you should stay!

Once more, with feeling ...

 
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