Having a good spring: Joba Chamberlain's mustache

Below you'll find two photos that I, using the latest in image-editing software, have merged together in one whiskered chemical reaction that is both beautiful and terrible to behold.

On the left (thank you, AP), you'll see Joba Chamberlain abashedly wearing a mustache that makes him look not unlike the archetypical "guy who drove a Camaro in the eighth grade." The hang-dog expression tells you it's not going well. But it's about to go very well.

On the right (hosannas, Getty Images), you see Joba Chamberlain with fully germinated glory atop his lip. Behold it. Also behold the sense of uplift it provides Mr. Chamberlain ...

In the span of mere weeks, Chamberlain's tickler has bloomed into one befitting a gentleman who can impregnate an entire room by the mere act of sitting down at a roulette table in Tangier, so long as he's wearing an ivory tuxedo.

Know this: Joba Chamberlain's mustache is absolutely in midseason form.

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