Mariners' best hope might be cleaning out front office
1. Go purchase one of those super-expensive pitchers. Like the Metsies in 2004, the Mariners find themselves in a position where they're going to have to overpay a big-name player or two to show that they're still vaguely relevant. The Mariners might have been linked with West Coast denizen Jason Schmidt before he signed with the Dodgers, but Barry Zito was and is the better call. He's proven he can pitch in the fiercer-than-Fiji American League and he's as healthy as an ox ... a healthy ox, that is.
Even with fans fleeing Safeco as if being chased by a fast, angry, healthy ox, the Mariners can certainly afford the six years/$96m it'll take to get a deal done. And just think how psyched the laser-flaky Zito would be to reside in a city that Pearl Jam calls home. No, this will never happen.
2. Ibanez has experienced a nigh-miraculous revival at the plate and enjoys a good-clubhouse-guy rep. At 34, however, it's somewhat unrealistic to expect his bat to remain quite as perky (.869 OPS, 123 RBI) as it was in 2006. Clearing an outfield spot to see if the once-hyped dyad of Chris Snelling and Adam Jones can play worth a hoot isn't the worst idea, either.
3. Oh -– Jeremy Reed, another fizzled phenom. He'll be 26 in June, right around the age that lapsed prospects tend to bloom. Even with the lowered expectations, the guy sure can chase down a fly ball. Several teams in spacious stadiums -– Florida and Colorado come to mind -– could use a guy with that particular skill. A low-level prospect or two would be a fine return for Reed at this point. It's not like the M's have anywhere to put him.
4. I loathe the Soriano-for-Ramirez trade. While Soriano has shown an inability to avoid elbow/shoulder issues, liners up the middle and low-flying aircraft, he doesn't cost much and he has one of those lightning-bolt arms that sets scouts a-slobberin'. Ramirez enjoys the distinction of being gimpy and mediocre, plus he adds a million or two to the payroll. Maybe the Mariners could have shed Richie Sexson's albatross of a contract by permanently affixing it to Soriano's arm; maybe Soriano could have been one of the chips to throw Boston's way in a Manny Ramirez deal. We'll never know. Bavasi should be sued for malpractice after this one.
5. Purchase a subscription to Soldier of Fortune and see if there's a heavily armed go-getter willing to take care of Bloomquist once and for all. There's no greater indictment of Bavasi, Mike Hargrove and the Seattle brainiacs than that they remain willing (as evidenced by the recently extended contract) to sacrifice 200 outs at the altar of Bloomquist and his ghastly bat. Short of the entire active roster oversleeping and missing the bus to the stadium, he shouldn't be on the field. Ever.
Odds of becoming the next Detroit Tigers: Is there such a thing as a negative percentage? There are few potentially elite prospects waiting in the wings -– with the possible exception of catcher/masher Jeff Clement, who's stuck for now behind Johjima.
On the plus side, barring the aforementioned disease and famine in competitors' clubhouses, Hargrove and Bavasi will likely be ejected with great prejudice after 2007. If I'm a Mariners fan, I'm rooting less for wins on the field than for the possibility, however slim, that ownership can locate the phone numbers of a few bright, aggressive baseball minds -– Bobby Valentine, anybody? -– between now and then.
