It looks like we now know why Rob Gronkowski missed the first six weeks of the season: He was perfecting the recipe to the Gronk-tini.
What's a Gronk-tini you ask? I have no clue, but any female who attends Gronkowski's 'Football 101 Women's Clinic' on Nov. 11 will be able to tell you shortly afterward. That's easily the best part of the $99 clinic that's being held at Harvard Stadium in Allston, Mass.
The Gronk-tini alone will probably be worth $99, but besides that, attendees will also get a T-shirt, a photo with Gronkowski and a Gronk autograph. Ladies will be able to drink all the Gronk-tinis they can during a cocktail hour leading up to the clinic. There will also be beer and wine, but it almost seems foolish to drink either of those when Gronk-tinis are available.
There's even coffee and dessert for ladies not interested in a Gronk-tini, but who wouldn't want a Gronk-tini.
It's only a matter of time before someone invents the Tebow-tini, which would probably be one part vodka, one part cranberry and one heart of a champion. That sounds better than a Gronk-tini, which is probably one part vodka, one part sweat and 11 more parts vodka.
(Wink of the CBS Eye to Deadspin)
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