As you can see in the picture above, Tulloch's turkey is spending its final hours in a hot tub that might actually be a fryer. Tulloch's turkey is also showing off the latest in turkey fashion trends, which include: sunglasses, dog tags and an unsmoked cigarette. My guess is that the turkey also knows algebra. I don't know why I think that, there's just something about this turkey that says 'I know algebra.'
Tulloch is probably doing the turkey a favor by eating him because judging by the turkey's smoking habits, it wasn't going to live much longer anyway.
Sitton called the Lions defense a bunch of 'scumbags' on Tuesday. However, Sitton must not have seen this picture because if he had, he wouldn't have included Tulloch in the scumbag statement because no one who dresses their turkey up like this could possibly be a scumbag. They might be a little odd, but not a scumbag.
(Wink of the CBS Eye to For the Win)