Earlier this week, Washington lobbyist Jack Burkman said that he was preparing legislation that would ban gays from the NFL.
”We are losing our decency as a nation,” he said in a statement. "Imagine your son being forced to shower with a gay man. That's a horrifying prospect for every mom in the country. What in the world has this nation come to?”
Yes, imagine the horror.
By Wednesday, Burkman had clarified his remarks, noting that he doesn't want to ban gays, he just wants to separate them from the rest of the team. Because, really, segregation isn't nearly as bad as prohibition.
“A lot of people say it's about discrimination or homophobia, it's not about any of those things,” Burkman said on 105.3 The Fan in Dallas. “We have basic standards of civility and common decency in our society. For instance, you don't have the cheerleaders go in and take a shower with the football players because we believe men and women should be separate, for reasons that they're sexual attracted to each other and other reasons we all understand.
"If you separate men and women, doesn't it make sense that you would separate a gay man and a straight man?”
No. No, it doesn't. The Daily Show's Jon Stewart touched on this earlier in the month, shortly after former Missouri linebacker Michael Sam announced that he was gay.
Burkman's bill, which he says will be released Wednesday evening, would impose harsh penalties for each violation -- in the $3-$8 million range, which seems reasonable if you're willing to concede that everything Burkman has said up to this point makes perfect sense.
"That's not discrimination against the straight man or the gay man, that's simply common decency in the same way you would separate a man and a woman.”
On Tuesday, Sam tweeted this:
Jack Burkman is going to need a Delorian, not some bogus bill, if he wants to prevent gay athletes from being in the locker room— Michael Sam (@MikeSamFootball) February 25, 2014
Burkman's response: “What Michael Sam cares about is, if he doesn't get drafted properly or doesn't get the contract he wants, he's going to cry discrimination,” he said. “He's going to have Ellen and George Clooney and Michelle Obama -- they're all going to say ‘we have to fight this team!'”
But in Burkman's mind, he's fighting for those who are afraid to speak up in today's PC world.
“NFL players are afraid,” he said. “They're afraid. Just like the owners, just like the Commissioner. They're all scared of the media. Everybody's running scared. They're afraid to tell the truth about this issue. They're running scared, because they don't want to take the heat I'm taking. They don't want to take the heat I'm taking.”