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Clear the NFL dance floor: This tango is only for two

INDIANAPOLIS -- In the NFL's biggest regular-season game in forever, New England won. The rest of the NFL lost.

The Patriots' 24-20 victory against Indianapolis wasn't just enormous for New England and deflating for the Colts. It was a devastating development for everyone else in the NFL, who were confronted with irrefutable proof of the gap between these two teams and the rest of the league.

Rodney Harrison and Ryan Diem will have another opportunity to tie up any loose ends. (Getty Images)  
Rodney Harrison and Ryan Diem will have another opportunity to tie up any loose ends. (Getty Images)  
The only defense in football that can slow down New England belongs to Indianapolis. And the only defense that can slow down Indianapolis is New England. What does that mean for everyone else? It means a lot of losses. A lot of ugly losses.

The Patriots aren't going to lose this season unless they fall at home to Indianapolis in the AFC title game. Likewise, the Colts aren't going to lose again until they're beaten for a second time by New England, one game before the Super Bowl.

Pittsburgh fans can try to convince themselves that the Steelers might win the AFC. Fans of Dallas and Green Bay can pretend their team would have a shot in the Super Bowl against the Patriots or Colts. I'm here to tell you that you're wrong. You're wrong, and you know you're wrong. Your team, whoever your team may be, cannot beat the Colts and cannot even compete with the Patriots. This is not the kind of argument you're going to want to make with your real name, so if you insist on leaving a message at the end of this story or in my feedback forum, use a pseudonym. Because your argument, such as it is, is laughable. And so are you for trying to make it. Trust me on this.

The Patriots and Colts aren't just pretty quarterbacks and media hype. They're nasty on defense, and defense wins championships. Those incredible offenses at New England and Indianapolis? That's just showing off. Cruel and unusual punishment for everyone else in the NFL.

Until Sunday, nobody had given New England a game because nobody could do a thing with the New England offense. The Patriots were averaging 41.4 points per game. Running backs Laurence Maroney and Kevin Faulk were averaging more than 4.7 yards per carry. Receivers Wes Welker and Randy Moss were on pace for more than 200 catches, 2,800 yards, 34 touchdowns and two Pro Bowl invitations. Donte' Stallworth was looking at a 50-catch, 800-yard monster season for a third receiver. Quarterback Tom Brady was on pace for 60 touchdowns and four interceptions, a season that would make him deserving of automatic Hall of Fame enshrinement.

But for 51 minutes Sunday, the Colts made the New England offense look silly.

Moss was dominant, but the only defense that can stop Randy Moss would be one designed by God. And God's too busy rooting for Jon Kitna to worry himself with the Patriots. However, Maroney was so ineffective, I asked my colleague Clark Judge -- only whimsically, people, I swear -- if he thought Maroney was shaving points. Welker was invisible. Stallworth was useless. Brady, who had thrown just those two interceptions in eight previous games, had two in this game.

And the Colts were doing it without two starting linebackers, injured Freddie Keiaho and Tyjuan Hagler. But Indianapolis did have defensive ends Robert Mathis and Dwight Freeney, who combined for two sacks and four quarterback hits and nearly drove New England tackles Matt Light and Nick Kaczur into early retirement. Light was so spooked, he committed two personal fouls, including a blatant leg-whipping that kept Freeney from delivering a knockout blow to Brady.

Poll
Which team will win the AFC?
  23% Colts
 
 
  64% Patriots
 
 
  13% A different team
 
 
 
Total Votes: 4292
And the Colts had heat-seeking missile Bob Sanders knifing past New England blockers to blow up Maroney for a 3-yard loss on third-and-1, forcing the Patriots into a field goal. And the Colts had linebacker Gary Brackett, who's short and fat and unstoppable, and who turned in a spectacular juggling interception in the fourth quarter.

"They're a good defensive team," Patriots coach Bill Belichick said, repeatedly, afterward. "They can rush the passer. They can cover. They can run."

The only hole is at defensive tackle, a position where Indianapolis is so unimpressive that I couldn't tell you one of their names even after watching this entire game.

The Patriots have no such problem. Their defensive tackles and defensive ends are interchangeable forces, with Ty Warren and Vince Wilfork and Richard Seymour and Jarvis Green making play after play after play. Linebackers Rosevelt Colvin and Mike Vrabel filled the stat sheet. The Patriots' front seven is so deep that I've just named six of them and haven't even gotten to Adalius Thomas, Junior Seau and Tedy Bruschi, all of whom are going one day into the Hall of Fame.

In the secondary, Asante Samuel is one of the better corners in the league, and while he didn't play great, he played well enough to help hold Peyton Manning to his least impressive game of the season (16-for-27, 225 yards, one touchdown, one interception). Safety Rodney Harrison was a one-man defensive smorgasbord -- intercepting a pass, knocking down another, stopping Joseph Addai three yards behind the line of scrimmage and shutting down Colts tight end Dallas Clark.

"As a defense, we came up with some big plays when it mattered," Warren said. "Everyone contributed in a fantastic way, which is what it takes to beat the Colts."

The Patriots will have to do it again in the AFC Championship Game, but it's too bad New England and Indianapolis can't play in the Super Bowl as well. I'd take Colts-Patriots III over Patriots 52, Packers 14.

 
 

 
 
 
 
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