I'm typing this on a Southwest flight to Jacksonville while Tardio defends doctors charged with malpractice on his laptop beside me. Tardio just ordered a beer and when the male flight attendant gave it to him he also gave him a cup to hold. Tardio said he would just take the can and the Southwest guy said, "No, you'll take the cup too." So now this empty cup keeps rolling around on our laptops. If there are any typos in this column, that's why.
Our beaver pelt trader of the week award is going to whichever UK student held up the Fear the Apostrophe sign at Gameday. I saw it on video but I haven't been able to see a picture online yet. Rest assured it was noted. I'm tearing up.
On to All That and a Bag of Mail.
Devin Chidester writes:
"Clay, as I was walking to the stadium on Saturday I saw a CBS Sports banner at a tailgate. Being a dedicated fan I stopped to inquire if they knew you. However, in return to my question, I received a blank stare from many people. Does CBS not like its best writer or should I assume they were star struck by your name?"
Remember how in the old days, pre-Civil War, the daughter on the plantation who got pregnant was kept in the bedroom and couldn't leave until she had miscarried the baby or it had been born and given away? Basically I'm the pregnant antebellum daughter of CBS Sports.
Chip Allen writes:
"Great column on Ole Miss and Faulkner. The next time you are in Oxford, go to the back of Nielsen's Dept. Store on the square and take a look at the scathing letter that Mr. Faulkner sent the owners when they had the gall to ask him to pay his tab.
"At one point in the letter surrounded by paragraphs that do everything but question the owner's lineage, he tells them that he is a famous author and that his letter would one day be worth more than the paltry sum that they were demanding that he pay. The letter is framed and displayed on the back wall near the customer service desk. Very funny."
I now have something else to see in Oxford that doesn't involve heels, sundresses, and alcohol.
Jason Davis writes:
"The waiving of the hand in front of the face was started by Georgia last year. Lots of the Dawgs were doing it by the end of the year. It actually comes from wrestling--home of much of the greatest smack talk in the world. John Cena does it before one of his 'patented' moves. It means 'you can't see me'.
"The point is that the taunter is on a completely different level than the taunted. Therefore, the taunted man can't even see the taunter. Like the Dawgs couldn't see the Vols. This crap makes a lot more sense when you don't have to explain it in an e-mail."
