A wise songwriter, perhaps Billy Joel or even the Notorious B.I.G, once said, "Either you're slinging crack rock, or you've got a wicked jump shot."
HBO's masterful series The Wire, which returns for its fifth and final season Sunday, deals with the first half of this equation. The NBA, naturally, deals with the second. And not surprisingly, the show and the league have a lot in common.
From disgraceful leaders who fail to uphold the law, to talented youngsters trying to make a name for themselves, the people who make up the The Wire and the NBA make for some easy comparisons. So as a primer for Season 5, here's a look at the show's current key players and their NBA equivalents.
Mayor Thomas Carcetti (Aiden Gillen) = David Stern
Like Stern, Carcetti is a diminutive white guy running the show in "a city that ain't" (white). And though the first-term mayor doesn't have the experience Stern has, he has plenty of the same problems. Drugs. Corruption. Education. White people moving away. But that just goes with being in charge. Because when politics is involved, anything goes. It's "all in the game."
Sen. Clay Davis = Ex-referee Tim Donaghy
A shady politician who'll do anything for a buck and a disgraced ref who bet on NBA games he worked? "Sh--------------------------t!" This one's a gimme.
Col. Cedric Daniels (Lance Reddick) = Phil Jackson
Over the course of the series, we've watched the calm, zen-like Daniels climb the ladder from a police lieutenant all the way into his current position as colonel. Like Jackson, he's a born leader who's noticeably smarter than his equals. Plus he gets the most out his troops and succeeds despite not getting along with his oft-bumbling superiors.
Detective Jimmy McNulty (Dominic West) = Allen Iverson
In a show packed with black characters, how exactly does the hard-drinking Irish cop make for the best match with Allen Iverson? Six simple words: "What the f--- did I do?" That might be McNulty's catch phrase, but it would work just as well for A.I. Both play by their own rules, see through the B.S of bureaucracy and do whatever it takes to come out on top. No matter what it is, they're on top of it.
Detective William "Bunk" Moreland (Wendell Pierce) = Carmelo Anthony
This comparison works in part because "The Bunk" is Jimmy McNulty's running (and drinking) buddy, and in part because both Bunk and 'Melo came out of the same rough Baltimore neighborhood proud and unscathed by the streets.
Detective Kima Greggs (Sonja Sohn) = Lauren Jackson
As an attempt to avoid being murdered, I opted to compare the best female detective on the show to the MVP of the WNBA. And yes, I had to look up who won the award last year. Not only that, but did you know that this Lauren Jackson lady led the league in scoring and was second in both rebounds and blocks? Wouldn't she be more helpful to the Heat than Luke Jackson?
Detective Lester Freamon (Clarke Peters) = Gilbert Arenas
The NBA's most visible oddball is the perfect match for the only Baltimore detective who spends his downtime making lucrative dollhouse furniture. Plus, as Season 4 came to a close, Freamon was filling up the stat sheet with discarded bodies the same way Arenas fills up the box score with point after point. Minus a few "hibachi" references, of course.
Sgt. Ellis Carver (Seth Gilliam) = Kevin Garnett
The freshly promoted Carver might not have the skills (or height) of K.G., but he has the intensity and loyalty down pat. From climbing atop his car to yell at mischievous kids to taking his frustrations out on his steering wheel to standing alongside his superiors in times of trouble to his commanding speech to disgruntled cops in this Sunday's episode, nobody on the show is as passionate about their work as Carver.
Thomas "Herc" Hauk (Domenick Lombardozzi) = Ricky Davis
Herc gets the Ricky Davis treatment simply because nobody can take a dump in the punchbowl quite like him. In Season 3, the (now former) cop blew the whistle on his almost-retired major's experimental plan, resulting in the major's pension being slashed significantly. Then in Season 4, Herc opted to save his ass and not to report a stolen police camera, which led to a series of tragic events among the neighborhood kids.
Kicked off the force after being successfully pranked by a ticked-off crackhead, it would seem as if Herc is no longer in a position to cause any more damage to the fragile Baltimore community. But like the game-to-game efforts of Ricky Buckets, you just have no idea what to expect.
Omar Little (Michael K. Williams) = Chris Paul
Just like Paul leading the NBA in steals, Omar has made a name for himself taking what belongs to those "in the game." A hyper-intelligent thief always one step ahead of the gangsters he intends to rip off, Omar is hands-down the point guard who runs the show in West Baltimore.
Proposition Joe (Robert F. Chew) = William "Worldwide Wes" Wesley
Don't know Worldwide Wes? Chances are your favorite NBA star does. Wesley is a tight companion with everyone from Jordan to LeBron, taking a shady role as the ultimate "guy behind the guy." On The Wire, that would be Prop Joe. Need a shipment of drugs? Go to Prop Joe. Need a high-stakes card game to rob? Go to Prop Joe. Need to find Prop Joe? Head over to his modest repair shop. A place "mortgage broker" Wes might be familiar with.
Marlo Stanfield (Jamie Hector) = LeBron James
Young. Smart. Cool. Mature. Feared. The comparisons between the NBA's best player and The Wire's new drug kingpin are hard to ignore. All LeBron needs is a scar on his face and a pair of tough-as-nails killers by his side at all times, and we'd really be onto something.
Chris Partlow (Gbenga Akinnagbe) = Zydrunas Ilgauskas
Felicia "Snoop" Pearson (Felicia Pearson) = Daniel "Boobie" Gibson
It says a lot about LeBron's supporting cast that Marlo's dynamic duo of death is represented by a plodding Lithuanian center and a guy who has the least-threatening nickname in sports history. Then again, Big Z looks remarkably like psycho killer Gaear Grimsrud (Peter Stormare) in Fargo, and Snoop has "boobies," so I guess the comparison isn't so weak after all.
Michael Lee (Tristan Wilds) = Kevin Durant
The newest kid on the corner, Michael is mature and talented beyond his years. Plus, despite being just 14 years old, Michael has his own NBA-style entourage -- his little brother Bug, and good pal, Dukie -- living with him in his personal apartment.
Reginald "Bubbles" Cousins (Andre Royo) = Ron Artest
Like Artest, Bubbles has had his share of troubles over the years. But in Season 5, America's favorite drug addict/police informant finally seems ready to get his act together and do something positive. If he falters, it would be sad, but hardly a shock. And no matter what happens, it won't be nearly as ugly as what would happen if Artest came home to "save" the Knicks.
