| The PCS Rankings (Pop Culture Standings) |
| Updated: September 9, 2008 |
| News Item |
Comment |
 |
| Tom Brady's Knee |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 1 |
- |
.987 |
 |
|
Through four Super Bowl runs, the Patriots asked Tom Brady to put the team on his shoulders. That sound you heard was the team falling off his shoulders and onto his left leg. Hope you had fantasy QB insurance. |
 |
| Britney Spears |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 2 |
- |
.941 |
|
|
MTV gives the rebounding diva some career mouth-to-mouth, and she didn't even have to make out with Madonna this time! |
 |
| Hockey Moms |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 3 |
- |
.899 |
 |
|
Sales are peaking for NHL season tickets and lipstick for pit bulls. Even crazier, the Sarah Palin glasses and hair-do are must haves right now. |
 |
| Hurricane Ike |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 4 |
- |
.882 |
|
|
Is there anything we can pollute the oceans with to make these storms go out to sea? Consider this your last warning, Mother Nature: We will conquer you. |
 |
| Vampires |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 5 |
- |
.814 |
|
|
With new HBO series, bestselling novels and big screen buzz, vampires now more popular than zombies. If you're not down with the vampires, it sucks to be you. |
 |
| 'Beanie' Wells |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 6 |
- |
.801 |
|
|
If he can't play against USC, at least the Buckeyes have Chris Wells as his backup. Wait, they're the same guy? Uh-oh. |
 |
| Russell Brand |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 7 |
- |
.703 |
|
|
Hey, look, another British guy who's going to be funny for about eight months or so. As soon as we get done watching your hilarious degenerate rock star character in "Forgetting Sarah Marshall" another five or six times, we'll let you move in with Sacha Baron Cohen. |
 |
| Cubs Slump |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 8 |
- |
.666 |
|
|
Losses, injuries, fan discontent ... it's like they're cursed or something. Are playoff tickets non-refundable? |
 |
| Brett Favre |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 9 |
- |
.644 |
|
|
NFL, global humanity can exhale now that he has won his first game for the Jets. |
 |
| Tropic Thunder |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 10 |
- |
.512 |
|
|
Whether he's playing an in-your-face macho guy or unlucky-in-love nebbish guy, America loves Ben Stiller movies (especially when he wears a wacky wig). |
 |
| MSNBC anchor shuffling |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 11 |
- |
.504 |
|
|
"Welcome to the Too Big For Our Britches Show." Looks like Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann couldn't be trusted to share the playpen after all. Tomorrow's face-off: "Will you stop touching me!?!?!?" |
 |
| Volcano Taco |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 12 |
- |
.501 |
|
|
Taco Bell can pour cheesy goo down my throat any day of the week. |
 |
| The Hills |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 13 |
- |
.414 |
|
|
There are so many ulterior motives among the drama, someone should start an "ULTERIOR MOTIVE ALERT" bottom-of-the-screen crawl. |
 |
| Michael Phelps |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 14 |
- |
.212 |
|
|
What's with this "Rosetta Stone" language builder commercial? And how many foreign languages do you need to learn if you're underwater half the day? Sheesh, it looks like this product and ad were made by his uncle. |
 |
| Tim Tebow for Heisman |
| Current |
Previous |
Pct. |
Rise/Fall |
| 15 |
- |
.015 |
|
|
That's so 2007. Through two games his stats are down, and the Gator offense was held in check by a more green than orange Miami team. Then again, Timmy's the only college player in the country who can vote for himself. |
| Also receiving votes:"Pasta from Pizza Hut" hidden camera commercials (the ads don't mention that these people who love Pizza Hut pasta favored rotten cabbage in a blind taste test). ... Brad Pitt as a personal trainer in a Coen Brothers movie (maybe in a sequel he can get The Dude back into shape from his roadie days). ... Matt Cassell's friends from high school (they're now phoning him for Patriots tickets). ... McDonald's Star Wars Happy Meal toys (they just spontaneously came to life and made a better movie than Clone Wars). ...NASCAR Chase for the Cup (will be won by a white guy in a car). |
| PCS Crystal Ball:No. 1 on Nov. 22, 2017: Notre Dame's football team begins season 12-0 thanks to scheduling its first 12 games against ACC schools. |
