Whether you prefer weepy dramas like Hoosiers and Remember the Titans, or nutty comedies like Slap Shot and Major League, chances are there are a bunch of sports films you know inside and out. Because even though your favorite teams let you down, you know your favorite movies never will.
While 2008 wasn't a fantastic year for sports movies, there were a few standouts sprinkled among the Leatherheads and Longshots of the world. With all due respect to the solid-looking The Express (honestly, does the world really need another manipulative, formulaic sports movie in which racial barriers are broken simply because of athletics?), here's a look at the 11 sports movies that mattered in 2008:
11. Leatherheads
If there's any reason I couldn't dub this column the "best" sports movie of the year, it's because Leatherheads should never be considered the best anything, unless you're making a list of the best ways to waste $60 million. And that's what really sucks about this movie. Not that it was lame, but that studios will now think twice, if not thrice, about making big-budget sports movies that don't fit the sentimental, Seabiscuit formula.
Sadly, I had high hopes for this film. The idea of George Clooney directing a screwball comedy about the early days of pro football sounds intriguing. Unfortunately, the pacing and humor that made a movie like It Happened One Night work so well come off as horribly awkward in 2008. Especially when you've got Clooney switching back and forth between goofy, Clark Gable mode and his own "deep-voiced Clooney" mode. Just poorly executed across the board.
10. Kung Fu Panda
I wasn't crazy about this animated martial arts epic, but believe it or not, it was the year's most successful film not about Batman or Indiana Jones. And since it follows the same formula as 2006's incredibly successful Cars, and last year's moderately successful (and highly entertaining) Surf's Up, don't be surprised if you're bombarded with kid-friendly cartoon sports movies at your local megaplex.
9. Gunnin for that #1 Spot
This fun documentary directed by Adam Yauch of the Beastie Boys follows eight of the nation's best high school basketball players as they prepare for -- and play in -- the 2006 Boost Mobile Elite 24 Hoops Classic in Harlem's famed Rucker Park. While the film is hardly original, it's awfully cool to see what life was like for Michael Beasley, Kevin Love, Jerryd Bayless and the electrifying Brandon Jennings just two years ago. And if it's fun now, just think about how interesting this time capsule will be in five or 10 years.
8. Speed Racer
Not a sports movie per se, but the lightning-fast, candy-colored, racing scenes are not only worth the price of admission -- they'll likely change cinematic racing forever. Other than that, chunks of this overlong kids' film are unspeakably awful.
7. Semi-Pro
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| Come on! It's Will Ferrell. You got to know what you're going to get when you see his movies. (Getty Images) |
6. Redbelt
5. Never Back Down
I'm going to hold off saying too much about these two movies as I plan on writing a column about mixed martial arts films in the New Year (lucky you!). But here we have two films, one by legendary playwright and director David Mamet, in which the moral of the story is to live by a warriors' code to keep your dignity, and the other an MTV-ready remake of the Karate Kid that proves you'll become popular if your classmates see you kicking ass on YouTube. Somehow the latter is a better movie. Go figure.
4. The Foot Fist Way
Did someone say kicking ass? Even though this no-budget comedy begins to drag toward the end, Danny McBride's performance as the slick-taking, Ferrari-driving redneck taekwondo instructor Fred Simmons is a thing of comedic beauty. McBride was better in small doses as the special effects wizard in Tropic Thunder, and especially as Red, the inept pot dealer in Pineapple Express ("You got killed by a Daewoo Lanos, M---------er!"). But this is where it all began. A cult sports film for the ages.
3. The Hammer I dedicated an entire column to this Adam Carolla boxing movie over the summer, so there's no need to go into detail here. Just know that sports movies are rarely as charming, heartfelt, and amusing as this little seen gem.
2. Bigger, Stronger, Faster*
Before seeing this movie, I almost lumped it in with Gunnin' For That #1 Spot, dubbing them the documentaries that will be better in five years (Gunnin') and would have been better five years ago (Bigger). I mean, isn't everyone but John McCain sick of steroids at this point? You bet. But that doesn't change the fact that this film is fantastic.
A documentary by weightlifter and former WWE writer Christopher Bell, Bigger takes a look at how American culture puts such an emphasis on success and physical appearance that steroids have become an integral part of society. He interviews athletes, bodybuilders, congressmen, doctors and even the father of a high school baseball player who killed himself.
The thing most of these people have in common is a belief that steroids are the root of all evil. The catch is, Bell isn't so sure. Are steroids any worse for you than legal substances like alcohol, cigarettes and anti-depressants? And why are steroids considered cheating if laser eye surgery, hyperbolic sleep chambers and cortisone shots (a type of steroid) are OK? And finally, if steroids are so horrible, then what do we say about people like Arnold Schwarzenegger, Hulk Hogan, Sly Stallone and Mark McGwire, who likely wouldn't be where they are today without them?
Mostly, though, Bell focuses on his two brothers -- one trying to make it as a pro wrestler and one a weightlifter and high school football coach -- both of whom use steroids. The interviews with his family are remarkably open and incredibly intense. At one point, the Bells' father openly wonders if his son Mike will one day die from a combination of substance abuse and depression for failing to achieve his goal of WWE superstardom. And sadly, just last week, his fear came true in a rehab facility in California.
Well thought out, emotionally revealing, breezily edited and constantly riveting, Bigger, Stronger, Faster* is one of the most important, and underrated movies in recent years.
1. The Wrestler
When Brett Favre made his first appearance at Jets training camp last summer, the team's P.A. system blasted Bruce Springsteen's Glory Days to get the crowd pumped. The odd thing here is that Glory Days is not a happy song. Sure, it sounds happy, but it's a song about being hung up in the past, when things were going well and you were at the top of your game.
As Favre got off the practice field that day, I'm sure his body ached, his face winced with pain and he wondered what the hell he was still doing to himself. But we don't see that side of athletes. We just see the glory. And that's precisely what makes Darren Aronofsky's The Wrestler such a phenomenal movie.
From the first moment we see him, post-fight, in a makeshift locker room, wrestler Randy "The Ram” Robinson is the embodiment of the dark side of athletics. Twenty years ago, he was a superstar. Now he wrestles for chump change, works in a supermarket and lives either in a trailer or his van, depending if he can make rent.
As you've likely heard, Mickey Rourke is simply amazing as The Ram. The parallels in his life and his character's are insanely similar, and all that "performance of a lifetime” hyperbole is true. The guy loses himself in the role, and while it'll be hard for Academy members to vote for a guy with long hair, tights and a love for Ratt over Richard Nixon and a gay rights activist, he just might win an Oscar.
But it's not just Rourke that's great. One of the most impressive things about The Wrestler is the sheer reverence it has for the performers, and the sport itself. Sure, we all know it's fake. But in this movie, wrestling has never seemed more real. In fact, the only character with anything negative to say about the sport is a cranky supermarket manager who watches porn on the job.
So if your favorite sports movies are the ones in which someone overcomes adversity to end up the trophy and the girl, then maybe The Wrestler isn't for you. But if you're at all interested at what happens when the glory fades, there's no doubt you should see this remarkable film.
