Who's giving you a rash this week? Overpaid player? Underhanded agent? Obnoxious team owner? Some other sports wretch?
Buckshots, a weekly dish-it-out-and-duck feature, invites you to take your best shot. Sign your name, if you dare.
Just remember, Ray Buck, SportsLine USA national columnist, has the last word.
E-mail your comments to: buckshots@sportsline.com
BUCKSHOT: Doing the math, Tony, I see you figure "Jake The Snake" to finish second only to Danny Wuerffel in what has become an anticlimactic Heisman race. Leadership and winning should count for something, i.e., an invite to New York.
"The Politically Correct and Politically Corrupt Mayor Brown ... safely ensconced in his penthouse suite in Paris, on a taxpayer-subsidized aggrandizement to 'convince' the apparently dimwitted Parisians that America's most beautiful city might be a vacation destination ... brought shame to all of those who supported him."
BUCKSHOT: Mayor Brown needs to stick to overstating the obvious. Come to think of it, isn't that the definition of politics?
"I mean, you guys get so mesmerized by those tangle-footed preppies from Florida that you're missing the Real Football Players. Fortunately for Corey and an army of other Pac-10 players, the NFL scouts don't have quite the problem with provinciality that the East Coast press seems to have."
BUCKSHOT: I admit. I'm less mesmerized by the country's fifth-leading rusher than the second all-time leading TD passer in NCAA Division 1-A history.
"(Marc) Trestman can't cut it and (George) Seifert has no guts. Oh well, just a few more weeks until Don (sic) Policy cleans house. (Bill) Walsh will make us right again."
BUCKSHOT: I'm not sure Don Policy or even Carmen Policy will clean house. But I'm sure of one thing: Bill Walsh is less and less in the shadows as we draw nearer and nearer to the playoffs.
"How many yards would Davis have if he ran behind Texas Tech's line? How many more times would he have the ball if Iowa State had any kind of defense at all. I think you are wrong!!!!"
BUCKSHOT: I think you are hypothetically conjectural.
"Then to make him Mayor of 'Baghdad by the Bay' ... only in California!
"By the way, which odds-maker, who must have been suffering from severe brain damage, made the Broncos a 2.5-point underdog against the Pats? What a gift!"
BUCKSHOT: Then how come the entire SportsLine USA panel of experts was stumped and picked New England? On second thought, don't answer that.
"Iowa State doesn't get the national attention of a team like Florida, but Troy should get the same respect as (Gator) players. Davis will be 10 times the player that the weak-armed Wuerffel will be in the NFL.
If Troy Davis doesn't win the Heisman and he does come back (for his senior year) and rushes for 2,000 yards again ... and ISU goes 3-8,. are you still going to keep the Heisman from him because he plays for the Cyclones?
"It's not fair!"
BUCKSHOT: Do you know the meaning of moot point? This time next year, Troy Davis will be in Week 13 of the NFL season.
"He should qualify that by telling the people that he will wait until after the next mayoral election to decide whether or not to move. That should get the mayor's attention
"The only bonehead who lacks intellectual prowess is Mayor Brown. I applaud Elvis Grbac for his composure and class in dealing with this idiot mayor."
BUCKSHOT: Japan, huh? What a small world. Mayor Brown shoots off his big mouth in Paris, and the only place they didn't hear (or care) about what he said was France.
"Detmer has had some good games throwing to some great targets, but he's had some poor performances also. He's been inconsistent and definitely is there because of his brother's name and numbers ... not his own!
Plummer is having a great year and his team probably deserves as much mention as him. What can you say about Davis? He's done it all two years in a row. Autry is solid -- not spectacular, but solid.
"Sarkisian deserves a little more mention than 'he plays in a system' and that 'his schedule is weak.' No one has ever done what he did to an A&M defense (let alone what he did to their minds over the next five weeks). And because BYU doesn't run the score up, Sarkisian's numbers, which are better than Wuerffel's, could be even better."
BUCKSHOT: You make some good points, but you don't give Manning and Detmer their just due. Especially the gutsy Manning, who has the gene pool on his side and will be either the first or second pick overall in next April's NFL draft.
asks this Diehard Packer Backer who doesn't give his name. "I've been a Packer fan my whole life and cannot believe that they cannot play with the level of intensity that is required to win in the National Football League.
"Are they on the take?"
BUCKSHOT: We tried to find out for you, DPB, by contacting a few of the players -- but they're still in therapy. They keep muttering "Lambeau Field. Playoffs. Lambeau Field. Playoffs. Lamb...."