Sports the Thrones: Breaking down 'Game of Thrones' as sports one last time

Well, that's all she wrote. The final chapter of "Game of Thrones" concluded with a polarizing finale that wrapped up eight seasons of the show. 

While the penultimate episode featured a fiery battle for King's Landing and the long-awaited Clegane Bowl, the final installment didn't feature a whole lot of action -- at least in the physical sense. There were some loose ends to tie up but most of them were worked out maturely and without massive amounts of bloodshed (with one major exception) and to that we have to say ... BOO!!!

In any case, it's time for the final edition of Sports The Thrones, the recap in which we take the latest "Game of Thrones" episode and turn it into sports by highlighting the best sports moments and athletic achievements from around the Seven Kingdoms.

One last ride. Here we go.

*Spoilers Ahead*

Tyrion digs for gold(en-handed dead brother)

There wasn't a ton of athletic achievements in this episode so we'll have to start here. Tyrion went on the hunt to find Cersei and Jaime and eventually managed to fit through some small openings to get to a massive pile of stone that buried his siblings. He then swiftly discovered their bodies by pulling off a handful of those stones. Didn't require a ton of athleticism but it was some damn good detective work.

Redemption for Ghost

Earlier this season we chastised Jon Snow for ghosting Ghost, his own direwolf, and neglecting to pat the good boy farewell at Winterfell. Well, we got a much-deserved redemption arc in the finale when Jon was reunited with Ghost at Castle Black and actually gave him some acknowledgment. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't rooting for Ghost to take a bite out of Jon just to remind him of his prior transgressions, but it was a nice moment.

Get in those steps

There was a TON of walking in this episode. It seemed like the first quarter of the episode was just people dramatically walking to and from places. Just because the war is over doesn't mean you get to quit on your cardio, I guess.

Disguising the coverage

There were plenty of leisurely strolls during the first half of the episode, but only one of them was interrupted by Drogon from out of nowhere. It seems like it'd be hard to miss a dragon in your direct vicinity but as Jon was going to meet with Dany, he was greeted by a completely camouflaged Drogon breaking cover to say hello. Without context it's a pretty bizarre scene that seems like a CGI flex more than anything else, but credit to Drogon for the stealth abilities. It's important to disguise your coverage while on defense. Not the best bodyguard, though ...

The sneak attack

So, yeah, about that meeting. Jon and Dany got together in what used to be The Throne Room but is now more like The Throne Convertible, and things didn't exactly work out the Mother of Dragons. After spending nearly eight seasons fighting for the Iron Throne, she got to touch it for about three seconds before Jon showed up and delivered a knife to the gut, ending her reign as queen. Tough break, but you've gotta give credit to Jon for the sneak attack. This is a guy who barely knew how to kiss a few short seasons ago and now he's kissing and killing at the same time. Pretty cool!

Drogon torches the Throne

In a very interesting turn of events, Drogon responded to Dany's murder by incinerating the Iron Throne instead of Jon, a move which I guess we're supposed to interpret as the dragon recognizing what really killed his "mother" and exacting his revenge. It was a cool visual display and you've got to give the beast credit for making quick work of the Throne but, man, if the dragon was smart enough to break down that metaphor you'd think maybe he'd also be smart enough to figure out that the only other living person standing in the room with his dead mama was probably the one who literally stuck the dagger in her. 

Sansa slam dunk

The most brutal murder of the final season may have been Sansa absolutely and ruthlessly dunking on her own uncle in front of the most powerful people in Westeros. Ol' Edmure Tully thought this was his golden opportunity to step up and make his case for the Throne but, as it turns out, not even his own family was willing to hear his case. You could feel him starting to pick up some momentum in his rah-rah speech when Sansa just stepped in, stole the rock, and then straight-up dunked it in his face. It was so brutal that all anyone could do was laugh in Tully's astonished face. At this moment, Sansa should have immediately been crowned queen of the Seven Kingdoms. It was the only choice.

Designated for Assignment: Daenerys Targaryen

Pete Blackburn is from Boston, so there's a good chance you don't like him already. He has been a writer at CBS Sports since 2017 and usually aims to take a humorous and light-hearted approach to the often... Full Bio

Our Latest Stories