This Week in Sports Internet: Tiger Woods is back, the Lightning get embarrassed, MLB's 'Let the Kids Play' debate
For a FRIDAY BONUS Steve Yzerman is back in Detroit!
It was a huge week for older sports fans. Tiger Woods won the Masters, people were angry at baseball players for having fun and a guy crushed it on Jeopardy! Every morning the adult crowd of the internet must have been like Thanos after the snap, sitting on their porch and surveying the sun rising over all of the wonderful land that they were granted. Then they hit the links and shot a 75 on nine holes.
However, perhaps even more than the internet's non-millennial residents, haters got their fill of sports as well. Jared Dudley chirped at Ben Simmons and probably regrets it now, the Lightning were swept aside by the BLUE JACKETS, and James Harden (thankfully) missed the most disrespectful shot attempt in NBA history.
Also, "Game of Thrones" premiered, which CBSSports.com's Pete Blackburn.
Here is your week in sports internet.
TIGER IS BACK AND EVERYONE WANTS YOU TO KNOW THEY SAW IT
Tiger Woods won the Masters on Sunday, a sentence that would not have been out of place a decade ago but definitely sounds out of place now. A sentence that WOULD have been out of place a decade ago is that Woods came back when he was down after 54 holes. He'd never done that at a major before last weekend at Augusta National.
This was huge for the golf world, and it might be the most engaged I've seen the country get in a single sporting event. This was the same day as the "Game of Thrones" premiere, and somehow Woods was the biggest story in the country. It seemed like the everyone wanted you to know that they were watching Tiger's comeback. Some () went as far as to call it the best comeback in sports history.
Also, Tiger's chase to break Jack Nicklaus' majors record is back on, so there's that too.
Lightning end historic season in historically depressing fashion
The Lightning finished the regular season with 62 wins, tied with the 1995-96 Red Wings for the most ever. In the postseason they won zero (0) games. Their stars disappeared in the series and the Blue Jackets, a team of rentals that got into the playoffs after the penultimate game of the season, became the first team to move onto the next round.
How demoralizing was it? Even the Lightning official Twitter account was dumbfounded.
That couldn't have been a fun message for Tampa's social media manager to type. As you'd expect, the response to that Tampa Bay tweet were excellent.
The Blue Jacket's social media manager, on the other hand, had a blast with the sweep.
Russell Wilson forgot to turn off his pillow talk voice
Russell Wilson is a great NFL quarterback. He also does a lot for the community in Seattle and, of course, is married to Ciara. He's got a lot going for him. He's also... weird. Look at how this man announced his new contract extension.
Russ... why does this sound like the interlude of an R&B song? He deserves every penny, but you just know that for a split second the Seahawks' front brass looked at this and went "are we sure?"
And this isn't just nitpicking. Wilsons' teammates got a hold of this and honestly upgraded it.
That is the guy who catches passes from Wilson and the guy who ostensibly protects his life mocking him openly. Now everyone gets a pass. Credit where it's due though: Showing up to signing day in a Sonics jacket is a sweet move.
Russ was rightfully mercilessly mocked far and wide for the video, though.
Yes, it's funny. But when you're making $100 million-plus you kind of get the right to flex like this.
NFL teams tweet their schedule reveals
It's true of every sport that fans tend to seek out information, but there are no thirstier fans than NFL fans. For NFL fans, everything has to be a big deal. Preseason announcements, schedule announcements, roster cuts, you name it. NFL teams are fully on it now and have somehow managed to make schedule reveals a big deal, which is insane but... kind of cool.
The Falcons hit us with a timely "Game of Thrones" theme to show where they'll be playing in 2019.
Granted they couldn't get copyright to the theme song, but we'll let the Ram running over the Saint make up for that.
The Panthers also let the creative juices flow, going with a classic video games theme.
The Chargers went full Clickhole and just used a bunch of stock images.
Are teams doing too much? Almost definitely. But that's the world we live in.
Tim Anderson makes people made by flipping a baseball bat
Hey everybody! Let the kids play! Look at how fun baseball is! But don't hurt the pitcher's feelings. Tim Anderson started a bit of a kerfuffle against the Royals on Wednesday when he blasted a home run in the fourth inning and tossed his bat towards the White Sox's dugout. Alas, he seemed to hurt poor Brad Keller's feelings and got plunked in his next at-bat, resulting in a benches-clearing scuffle that saw Anderson and Keller get ejected.
Thus began the eternal debate of whether baseball players having fun is, in fact, bad. Randal Grichuk inexplicably decided he should subtweet Anderson on the topic.
Anderson of course found the tweet and replied to Grichuk.
Anderson was handed a one-game suspension (for language, not the bat flip), while Heller will be forced to sit out for five games. Maybe next year we can let the kids play?
The Warriors blew a 31-point (not 3-1) lead; Jared Dudley really messed up
The numbers "3," "1," and "31" are all going to be retired in Golden State out of superstition. With 7:30 in the third quarter of Game 2, the Warriors looked ready to go up 2-0 on the Clippers. Then the Clippers pulled off a historic 31-point comeback, knotting the series up at 1-1. Yes, I know about the 3-1 jokes. Yes, I made one. No, I'm not proud of it.
Elsewhere in the NBA, Jared Dudley and the Nets went up 1-0 on the 76ers. Ben Simmons started slow, notching just nine points in Game 1 and 18 in Game 2. Before Game 3, Dudley called Simmons "average" in the half court, and Simmons responded by dropping 31 points to put the Sixers up 2-1 in the series. After the game, Simmons simply said he doesn't "have the energy" to deal with trash talk, which we all know is blatantly a lie.
Finally in petty NBA world, Kyrie Irving showed up to a game with an atlas because of course he did and James Harden missed this shot, which would have ended the NBA (and Ricky Rubio's career) as we know it.
Steve Yzerman heads back to Hockeytown
Nothing more accurately summates Red Wings fans' reactions than this:
Needless to say, it's been a busy week. But that's April for you.
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