Yes: 'Urinal gaming system' coming to minor-league park
Do you find urination impossibly boring? Then by all means make your way to a Lehigh Valley IronPigs game.
Because not all bodily functions are inherently fun, the Lehigh Valley IronPigs of the Triple-A International League -- enterprising American heroes, one and all -- have struck a mighty technological blow against male urination as we know it. Behold the "urinal gaming system":
When a user approaches the urinal, the video console flips into gaming mode, using patented technology that detects both his presence and stream. Algorithms then allow the user to engage with the screen by aiming in different directions to test their agility and knowledge. The games are 100% intuitive and custom-built to provide a unique user interface along with an easy and seamless experience.
You shall know him by his presence and stream! Fear not: There is video (safe for work!):
Ignore for the moment that the animated urine that stars in the above action-news footage is symptomatic of poor hydration, and instead focus on this fact: Urinal video games -- urinal leaping video games! -- are soon to be in place all the hell over Coca-Cola Park in Allentown, Pa.
Death to the drudgery of pee-pee!
Soon enough, people, nothing will be boring ever again.