No criminal charges against Pippen in sushi altercation

Former Chicago Bulls star Scottie Pippen won't face charges stemming from a fight with an autograph seeker outside a Malibu sushi restaurant, the Associated Press reported Tuesday.

Los Angeles County prosecutors said there was insufficient evidence to bring against Pippen while noting that the other individual involved, 49-year-old Camran Shafighi, was intoxicated. The altercation occurred in June when Shafighi attempted to get Pippin's autograph and took pictures of the Hall of Famer.

Shafighi, who was taken to the hospital that night for a head injury, has filed a $4 million lawsuit against Pippen back in July.

But wait, it gets better! Not only was he intoxicated, but he was reportedly on opiates and then faked seizures. From the AP: 

Shafighi, who has filed a $4 million lawsuit against Pippen, was taken to a hospital with a possible concussion. All tests showed there wasn't any internal trauma, but Shafighi returned to the hospital later and told doctors he had been diagnosed with fractured ribs and ankle, the report said. The only visible physical injuries were a small bruise on Shafighi's chin and a cut to his lip.

Shafighi, whose blood sample turned up positive for opiates and a 0.18 percent blood-alcohol level — twice the legal limit for driving — also feigned having seizures, according to the report. The seizures ended when the doctor ordered him to stop them.

The physician who examined Shafighi told investigators he believed Shafighi was "making up stuff," the report said.

Pippen's attorney, Mark Geragos, indicated his client will sue.

"This shakedown artist was drunk, screaming racial slurs, and assaulted my client and his family," Geragos said. "Scottie and his family are grateful to the sheriff for their investigation and DA for their decision to reject these unfounded charges. Scottie and his family plan on holding this man accountable for his outrageous actions."

Steve Kaplan, a spokesman for Shafighi's lawyer Lee Boyd, said they were reviewing the report and couldn't immediately comment.

So he tried to fake out the hospital with injuries, including fractures (you know, the kind of thing you can tes for pretty easily) and he was on opiates at the time. My question? If you're on opiates, wouldn't a sushi restaurant be kind of terrifying? And if that isn't bad enough, then you try and pick a fight with Scottie Pippen over an autograph? 

People are weird, man. 

Here's the lesson. You ready? Don't get drunk and high on opiates and then try and pick a fight with Scottie Pippen over an autograph. That won't work out well. 

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