Former Giants quarterback -- and Super Bowl champ! -- Jared Lorenzen blew up the Internet Monday night when videos emerged of him playing for the Northern Kentucky River Monsters of the Continental Indoor Football League while weighing in at 320 pounds.
Lorenzen joined The Jim Rome Show on CBS Sports Radio Tuesday to talk about all the attention he received and said that he "absolutely love[s]" the nicknames he's given.
"I love them. I absolutely love them,” said the 32 year old. “I was listening to some of your other ones [like] The Abominable Throwman. All of these, I love them. I was given them in college and there were websites dedicated to these things."
What's his preference, though? It used to be "J-Lo" when he hoped that Jennifer Lopez would hear about it and try to meet him. (Yeeeeeeeahhhh....) But he's now embraced "Hefty Lefty" as the top choice.
“I always said it was J. Lo,” said Lorenzen. “Because I thought eventually she’s going to want to meet me and that didn’t pan out. So, I think its Hefty Lefty. I think that’s the one everyone is stuck with.”
Look at the pictures taken from Lorenzen's game and you can see that he's bigger (way bigger) than his offensive linemen. That's nothing new.
"I’m bigger than all of them," Lorenzen said. "But I was bigger than my lineman in college; I was bigger than some of them in the NFL. When I came out of the womb I was 13 pounds, 3 ounces, from the get go."
THIRTEEN POUNDS. That is one giant freaking baby. Of course it makes sense when you see Lorenzen now.
And what would you do if you were a cornerback and you saw Lorenzen in the open field tomorrow during a game? Because Lorenzen wants you to try and tackle him. Please.
“Well, obviously, I’m going to juke him. I mean, come on," Lorenzen said. “No, you know what I’m going to do -- I look into his eyes, and if he looks down, I’m either going to try to go around him or jump over him. But if he’s looking at me, eye to eye, I’m going to try run him over.”
That would be a reality show I'd watch on a daily basis, frankly. Just Lorenzen lining up against a defensive back in the open field and seeing if they can tackle him. Someone get a Kickstarter going.
And while you're at it, go ahead and start a fund for Lorenzen to get a uniform that's got a more slimming color.
“It was really fun, I had a great time,” Lorenzen said. "Trust me, man, if I knew all of this was going to come, because I look God-awful in white, I probably would have changed my colors."