It's Gritty! Philadelphia Flyers' new mascot is pure, unadulterated nightmare fuel
The new Flyers mascot is here to ruin the innocence of countless youths
Greetings, Philadelphia Flyers fans ... meet your new mascot. He is absolutely terrifying. The Flyers introduced "Gritty" to the public on Monday morning. He looks like the lovechild of Animal from "The Muppets" and Youppi, the Montreal Canadiens' mascot. Just have a look for yourself.
If you're interested in that trash monster's bio, here it is:
His father was a "bully," so naturally he has some of those tendencies - talented but feisty, a fierce competitor, known for his agility given his size. He's loyal but mischievous; the ultimate Flyers fan who loves the orange and black, but is unwelcoming to anyone who opposes his team. Legend has it he earned the name "Gritty" for possessing an attitude so similar to the team he follows.
He claims that he's been around for a lot longer than we know it, and recent construction at the Wells Fargo Center disturbed his secret hideout forcing him to show his face publicly for the first time. He has some oddities that are both humorous and strange. A number of times he's been caught eating snow straight from the Zamboni machine, and unbeknown to most, his love of hot dogs has been inflating the Flyers Dollar Dog Night consumption totals for years.
That being said, there's no denying that he's one of our own.
As you'd imagine, the internet was completely taken aback by the mascot -- the first one to represent the Flyers since 1976 -- and they had some fun at Gritty's expense.
Considering he looks like Flaming Hot Cheetos soaked in acid, the Flyers were likely aiming for (and expecting) a strong reaction to their newest team member. Well, congratulations on a mission accomplished.
In all honestly, it's actually kind of awesome that they went so far off the rails with this dude. We need more disgusting, horrifying and sadistic mascots in sports. Thank you for doing your part, Philly.
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