Steve Spurrier never met a target at which he didn't enjoy aiming verbal jabs. Not only did Spurrier revolutionize college football with vertical passing, he became a rare coach who spoke his mind, for better or for worse.
With Spurrier's retirement set to become official Tuesday, let's take a look back at some of his all-time best one-liners.
Tennessee
On Tennessee regularly playing in the Citrus Bowl during his Florida years: "You can't spell 'Citrus' without U-T."
On quarterback Peyton Manning: "I know why Peyton came back for his senior year. He wanted to be a three-time MVP of the Citrus Bowl."
On South Carolina playing at Tennessee: "Will be the 14th time I've coached in Neyland Stadium. ... I've coached there more than some of their head coaches."
Florida State
On an NCAA scandal: "You know what FSU stands for, don't you? Free Shoes University."
On illegal hits on his quarterback, Danny Wuerffel: "He's like a New Testament person. He gets slapped up side the face and turns the other cheek and says, 'Lord, forgive them for they know not what they're doing.' I'm probably more of an Old Testament guy. You spear our guy in the earhole, we think we're supposed to spear you in the earhole. That's kind of where we're a little different."
On Gamecocks defensive end Jadeveon Clowney getting a speeding ticket: "I didn't know Jadeveon's car could go that fast. He doesn't have a pretty car like those FSU guys used to drive."
Clemson
On the state of South Carolina's program (attributed to him by the Gamecocks’ play-by-play broadcaster and the team’s Twitter feed): "We aren't LSU and we aren't Alabama. But we sure ain't Clemson."
On Clemson coach Dabo Swinney's anger over the above quote: "I said, 'Well, what do you want me to do? I didn't say it.' Smart people don't believe everything they read, and they don't believe hearsay. ... I guess Dabo believed it."
On Swinney saying he and Spurrier are from different planets -- Swinney from Mars and Spurrier from Pluto: "Dabo probably thinks there's (still) nine planets out there."
Auburn
On a fire at a football dorm that destroyed 20 books: "But the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet."
Georgia
On not playing Georgia early in the season: "I sort of always liked playing them that second game because you could always count on them having two or three key players suspended."
On Georgia recruiting: "Why is it that during recruiting season they sign all the great players, but when it comes time to play the game, we have all the great players? I don't understand that. What happens to them?"
On whether Florida would beat Georgia: "Is Ray Goff still coaching there?"
Vanderbilt
On why he might lose more in the NFL than in college: "There are no Vanderbilts in the NFL."
On Vanderbilt turning into a tough opponent: "They're not slow guys anymore."
Alabama
On recruiting in Alabama: "In 12 years at Florida, I don't think we ever signed a kid from the state of Alabama. Of course, we found out later that the scholarships they were giving out at Alabama were worth a whole lot more than ours."
On Nick Saban’s accomplishments: "He's got a nice little gig going, a bit like (John) Calipari. He tells guys, 'Hey, three years from now, you're going to be a first-round pick and go.' If he wants to be the greatest coach or one of the greatest coaches in college football, to me, he has to go somewhere besides Alabama and win, because they've always won there at Alabama."
Texas A&M
On Kevin Sumlin’s $5 million a year salary: "Kevin Sumlin is a good coach. ... He's a good negotiator, too. He's got a good deal."
Kentucky
On Kentucky coach Hal Mumme: "If I had a defense like Hal Mumme, I'd be trying (onside kicks) during every kickoff."
The Media
On attending SEC Media Days: "Told my wife as I was leaving, 'You know what, I've been to this thing 20 years now.' But you guys have been here 30, 40 years, some of you. They don't fire media people, we found that out."
Assistant Coaches
On Florida defensive coordinator Jon Hoke: "Jon Hoke's going into his third year. I think he's learned a lot. I hope he's going to be smarter."
SEC Commissioners
On criticizing SEC commissioner Roy Kramer, the creator of the BCS, for use of the Coaches’ Poll to decide the champion instead of a playoff: "But Coach Kramer says the coaches are very honest in their voting."
His Critics
On South Carolina’s 7-6 2014 season that caused speculation Spurrier is nearing retirement: "As most of you know, I'm a big believer in Attila the Hun's book. He said it very simply, 'It's the simplest truth that the greater your accomplishments or victories, the greater opposition, torment and discouragement your enemies will throw in your path. Expect it and don't become a victim of it.' I'm telling our fans, expect those people that are our enemies to talk bad about us. We finally won enough games, though it wasn't much last year. We've won enough that they're trying to convince that my age has something to do with it."
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