As noted in this space, Derek Jeter, whose group's bid to buy the Marlins is poised to go through, may have designs on getting rid of the home-run sculpture at Marlins Park. This, of course, is bad news, as said sculpture is objectively a national treasure and should obviously be granted the legal protections that accompany landmark status. 

Now, though, there's reason for hope. Here's this bit of baseball uplift from Douglas Hanks of the Miami Herald

"The County commissioned and purchased the Home Run Sculpture with the public art funds generated by the ballpark project," Michael Spring, head of the county's cultural affairs arm, said in an email Thursday. It "was designed specifically for this project and location and is permanently installed. It is not moveable."

Got it, Jeets? "Not moveable" -- so keep your mitts off the statue and think of other ways to realize your fever-dreams of Yankee corporatist mundanity. On another level, yeah, when you build your place of business on the backs of taxpayers, which is what Jeffrey Loria and the Marlins did, then sometimes you don't get to do every little thing you wish to it. 

In conclusion, check yourself, Cap'n, and viva la this thing ...