The list of things that Bill Belichick does not have time for is already quite long, but we can add another item to it this week: Stealing practice shorts.
A report out of Foxborough this week says that Belichick has swapped out the Patriots' normal, team-issued gray shorts in favor of some abominable orange atrocities because too many players were taking the gray shorts home. You see, those shorts were supposed to be kept around the team facilities, for official use only.
With Belichick being a stickler for the rules -- unless he can bend them to his own competitive advantage, of course -- he was not happy with this unfathomable shorts heist, so he implemented a new strategy to deter players from taking their shorts home.
The solution? Butt ugly orange shorts.
Some of the ugliest orange shorts are all around Pats locker room. Apparently too many players were taking the old gray ones home and not keeping them at facility as required. How to fix the problem? Change the color to something no one would want to be seen in outside facility.
— Mike Reiss (@MikeReiss) November 7, 2018
It's not the worst strategy in the world, if we're being honest. If the shorts aren't undesirable enough to leave in the practice facility, at least the color will probably help identify which culprits are breaking the rules and bringing them home.
Unfortunately, photos of the new shorts have yet to hit the internet, only leaving us to wonder just how hideous they might be.
And, for what it's worth, the gray shorts have apparently been a hit in New England's locker room for a long time.
I remember those. Good underwear.
— Tedy Bruschi (@TedyBruschi) November 7, 2018
HAHAHA this is amazing! I think I still have some of the gray ones at my house from when I was younger. https://t.co/Lj1WtJk1IA
— Geoff Schwartz (@geoffschwartz) November 7, 2018
We'll have to keep an eye on how #ShortsGate affects morale in New England moving forward.