The Super Bowl takes place this weekend (if you haven't heard), which means you can bet on pretty much anything. And when I say anything, I mean anything. The biggest game in football coincides with the biggest party in golf, and there some crossover bets so absurd I don't even know what to do with them.

Let's take a look at five from BetDSI that are sure to make your head spin and your wallet burn. No action takes place on these if a player misses the cut.

Which will be higher? 

Phil Mickelson total birdies on Sunday (-115)
Julian Edelman receptions (-115)

Which will be higher? 

Bubba Watson long drive on Sunday (-160)
Tom Brady passing yards (+125)

Which will be higher? 

Rickie Fowler score on Sunday (-130)
C.J. Anderson rushing yards (+100)

Which will be higher? 

Jon Rahm total birdies on Sunday (-110)
Jared Goff rushing yards (-120)

Which will be higher?

Super Bowl LIII attendance (as reported by Wikipedia page) (-250)
Waste Management Phoenix Open Sunday attendance (as reported by tournament) (+190)

These are all absurd but the one about Watson's longest drive against Tom Brady's passing yards is preposterous. For the record, though, Brady is averaging 272 yards a game this year, and Watson is averaging 292 yards per drive this season.

Regardless of the hilarity of some of these wagers, there will undoubtedly be folks who put real, American cash down on them. They'll be begging for Jared Goff to match his two playoff rushing performances of 12 and 10 yards after Rahm makes eight birdies to win in Phoenix on Sunday. 

Oh, and you should definitely take Super Bowl attendance in the face of Phoenix Open Sunday attendance. Lock that baby up (but don't mention my name).