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News, as breaking as it is urgent: The Orioles are holding a contest in which the baseball-admiring layperson is tasked with designing a t-shirt -- an Orioles t-shirt, as it turns out.

The link above provides this helpful breakdown of the evaluative criteria:

  • Judging: 40% creativity and originality; 30% team spirit; 30% overall aesthetics

Also helpfully included is this dreamsicle template, upon which you may craft your textile art. It is your unpainted Sistine Chapel ceiling, if you will ... 

What does the winner of the contest get? As noted above, redeemable U.S. glory is yours for the claiming ...

As part of Fan Appreciation Week, we want YOU to design our final T-shirt giveaway, which takes place on Thursday, September 26.

Get started now, and then please check back soon so that you can upload your original artwork for a chance to see your design featured on the shirt given to the first 10,000 fans 15 & over at the Orioles/Blue Jays game. The winner will also receive four (4) tickets to attend the September 26 game.

Because we at Eye On Baseball are not only for the people but also of the people, I have decided to contribute my own design, which, as you'll soon see, is informed by the Orioles' proud history and the prevailing sense of leisure native to the t-shirt-wearer.

Please regard:

On the front you'll find a representative sampling of a photo we quite admire in this space. It's Earl Weaver -- not wearing this or any other shirt -- festooned with possible appendectomy scar, restorative cigarette and pop-top Schlitz at the ready and Don Stanhouse lost in an embrace that is at once loving, captive and manly. It's an iron-on patch.

On the back we have Arnie Portocarrero's 1959 Topps card astride a sweet-ass Orioles pool table.

Your move, everyone everywhere.