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With Halloween right around the corner, this week seems like a good time to take a look at the most frightening things in the NFL this year. I'm thinking we should start with the perpetual nightmare that is the Browns' quarterback situation. 

The situation is so confusing right now that Browns fans don't even know who the starting quarterback is, and neither does their coach. 

In Week 6, Kevin Hogan became the team's 28th starting quarterback since 1999. He didn't even last a week after DeShone Kizer was given the job back in Week 7. He didn't even make it until the second half of Week 7 because Cody Kessler came in during the third quarter Sunday. If that sounds confusing, I think it's because that's what the Browns want. You can't be mad if you're confused. It's a solid strategy and I'm pretty sure it also works in relationships.  

The saddest part of the Browns' story is that none of this had to happen if Cleveland would've just drafted Carson Wentz in 2016 or Deshaun Watson this year. However, the Browns decided to pass on both players and trade those picks away to the Eagles and Texans. 

The only thing more baffling than the Browns' draft strategy is that someone in Hollywood decided Michael Bay would be the right person to produce a "Dora the Explorer" movie. 

I've watched enough Dora with my niece to know this isn't going to be a good combination. That's basically like letting Stephen King write the script for the "My Little Pony" movie. It makes no sense. 

You know what else doesn't make sense? The clip below. I've spent the past 48 hours trying to figure out what exactly is happening here and I've come up empty. 

I guess that's what happens when your team has a winning record this late in the season for the first time in 10 years. The only thing more confusing than that clip are these polar bears who have taken a Russian village hostage.

It's probably in all of our best interests to get behind our new polar bear overlords as soon as possible because I'm guessing they're probably eventually going to come for all of us. 

Anyway, let's get to the Week 8 picks. 

Actually, before we get to the picks this week, I implore you to click over and check out the NFL picks from our other writers here at CBSSports.com. The reason you should click over and check out the other experts this week is because Ryan Wilson had the most improbable week in the history of NFL picks. 

Wilson destroyed everyone in America with his picks in Week 7, and then destroyed himself. The CBSSports.com NFL writer went an amazing 13-2 with his picks straight up, but then fell flat on his face and went 0-13-2 against the spread. I didn't believe these numbers myself until I saw them. Wilson was pretty much the best picker in the country straight up (according to our friends at Pickwatch) and the absolute worst against the spread. The real-life equivalent of this would be getting 11 phone numbers at a bar ... but then they all turn out to be fake. I think that actually happened to me once. 

If you want to use Wilson's picks this week or just send him a giant LOL for his picks against the spread from last week, I suggest following him on Twitter. If you don't want to use his picks, I suggest following him anyway because he does a podcast with his son and they talk about fun things like how kindergarten is going. I miss kindergarten. 

Alright, let's get to the picks. 

NFL Week 8 Picks

Miami (4-2) at Baltimore (3-4)

8:25 p.m. ET (CBS/NFL Network/Amazon)

The Dolphins offense has been so bad this season that watching an actual dolphin try to play football would've probably been more entertaining than watching this team over the past six weeks. 

The Dolphins have been the most inexplicable team in the NFL. Despite the fact that their offense is ranked dead last in total yards, they've somehow managed to come back from double-digit second-half deficits in their past two games. The Dolphins are so bad they're good, which I think makes them the Jean-Claude Van Damme of NFL teams because that basically describes every movie he made from 1989 to 1995. I don't even really like the movie "Sudden Death" but I watch it every time it's on TV because I can't bring myself to look away. I'm thinking Dolphins fans feel the same way about their offense. 

The crazy thing about the Dolphins is that their starting quarterback just got hurt and that might end up WORKING OUT IN THEIR FAVOR. When most NFL teams lose their starting quarterback, the fan base just assumes the season is over. With the Dolphins, their fans are thinking, "Well, we had the worst offense in the NFL with Jay Cutler, so theoretically, things can't possibly get worse with Matt Moore" and it makes sense. 

I have no idea if Moore is actually better than Cutler, but that shouldn't matter Thursday because all Moore really needs to be able to do against the Ravens is hand the ball off. Baltimore is giving up 145.3 yards per game on the ground, which ranks last in the NFL. If you spent the first pick in your fantasy draft on Jay Ajayi this year, that pick might finally pay off this week. 

The pick: Dolphins 19-16 over Ravens

Atlanta (3-3) at N.Y. Jets (3-4)

1 p.m. ET (Fox)

I'm not sure if Kyle Shanahan left a copy of his playbook lying around when he left Atlanta to take the head coaching job in San Francisco, but if he did, the Falcons might want to start using that, because whatever Steve Sarkisian is doing isn't working. 

Actually, I'm not going to completely blame Sarkisian for the Falcons' failure because it's starting to look like maybe the Falcons just forgot to tell him that he would have to play against AFC teams this season. Sarkisian's offense has done just fine against NFC teams this season, but it seems to suffer a total meltdown whenever it faces an AFC team. 

Normally, i'm not a big fan of picking a team quarterbacked by Josh McCown to win a game, but McCown has better stats this season than Matt Ryan, which is borderline crazy when you consider that Ryan was the NFL MVP last season. Through seven weeks, McCown has more touchdown passes, a higher completion percentage and a better QB rating. Matt Ryan is turning into a poor man's Josh McCown, which is something I never thought I would write about the reigning NFL MVP.  

The pick: Jets 20-17 over Falcons

Houston (3-3) at Seattle (4-2) 

4:05 p.m. ET (CBS) 

"Houston, we have a problem."

I didn't want to start with that line, but I had to because the Texans actually do have a problem: They have to play against a quarterback who has never lost at home to an AFC team. Although that sounds almost unbelievable, it's true. Since being drafted in 2012, Russell Wilson is a perfect 11-0 at home against AFC teams. It's the most underappreciated streak in sports, which makes sense because Wilson might be the most underappreciated quarterback in the NFL.  

Think about it, the Seahawks' offense has been decent this season despite the fact that the line is horrible and they barely having a functioning running game. The Seahawks' entire offensive game plan generally revolves around Wilson being forced out of the pocket because he's being chased by three defensive players who didn't get blocked by his offensive line. The chase usually involves about 10 seconds of scrambling before Wilson eventually uncorks a perfect pass on a route that he likely drew up in the huddle. Based on his scrambling ability, Wilson would probably be a good marathon runner because I'm pretty sure he's running the equivalent of at least 26 miles per game.   

Since the Seahawks are playing an AFC team, there's obviously no way I can pick against them. Not only is Wilson 11-0 all-time at home against the AFC, but he's also 8-1 overall in his past nine nonconference games -- home or away -- and in those nine games, he has thrown 28 touchdown passes and just three interceptions. 

The pick: Seahawks 22-19 over Texans

Pittsburgh (5-2) at Detroit (3-3)

8:30 p.m. ET (NBC)

My favorite ongoing drama in the NFL this year is the Martavis Bryant situation in Pittsburgh. Although he has been suspended twice and has zero leverage with the Steelers, Bryant is apparently making demands that the Steelers either get rid of him or give him more playing time. This is basically the equivalent of Steven Seagal demanding to star in a Spielberg film. Like, you're lucky to even have a career at this point, so maybe don't get greedy. 

The good news for the Steelers is that the drama doesn't seem to be bothering them. As a matter of fact, I think they might actually be thriving on it. 

Even if the Steelers didn't thrive on drama, I would still pick them in this game because the Lions might be the worst Sunday night team in NFL history. I don't know if that's actually true, but I do know that they haven't won a Sunday night game THIS CENTURY (0-6). If this game were being played at 1 p.m. ET and the Lions were playing the Browns instead of the Steelers, I would take Detroit, but that's not the case, so I'm going to have to go with Pittsburgh. 

The pick: Steelers 30-20 over Lions 

Denver (3-3) at Kansas City (5-2)

8:30 p.m. ET (ESPN)

After the Broncos lost to the winless Giants in Week 6, I didn't really think their season could get much worse. Then they went out and proved me completely wrong by getting SHUT OUT against the Chargers. Things have been so ugly in Denver that fans are now at the point where they're calling for Colin Kaepernick. 

At this point, I think fans in Denver would also settle for the 2015 version of Peyton Manning. 

After watching the Broncos average just 10.5 points over the past four weeks, I'm completely confident in saying that they're not going to be able to score more points than the Chiefs on Sunday, and if you can't score more points than the other team, then that means you lose.

By the way, after the Broncos play the Chiefs, they have to play the Eagles and the Patriots, so although I'm not going to say this is a must-win game in Kansas City, this is a must-win game and I don't think the Broncos are going to win it. 

The pick: Chiefs 27-13 over Broncos

NFL Week 8 picks: All the rest

BYES: Cardinals, Giants, Jaguars, Packers, Rams, Titans

Last Week

Best pick: Even though the Chargers were 0-3 at home going into Week 7, I picked them to win, and that's mainly because if I know anything about people in Los Angeles, it's that they love showing up fashionably late to pretty much everything. Some people show up fashionably late to parties. The Chargers decided to get a fashionably late start on actually trying to win games this season, and it worked -- they beat the Broncos 21-0. 

Maybe the Chargers are actually going to fit right in after all. 

On the other hand, I don't think L.A. has exactly embraced the Chargers yet. I mean, I'm not even 100 percent sure there were any Chargers fans at this Chargers game. 

Of course, if the Chargers want more Chargers fans at their home games, maybe they just need to rethink their fan recruitment strategy. 

That should work.  

Worst pick: There was a game in London and if I've proven one thing over the past three years, it's that I have no idea what I'm doing when I have to pick the winner of a game in London. In Week 7, I predicted that the Cardinals would beat the Rams and then they turned around and lost by 33, and that's not even the most embarrassing part. The most embarrassing part is that picking the Cardinals wasn't even my worst London pick of the season. The honor goes to my Ravens-Jaguars pick in Week 3 when I took Baltimore to win, only to watch them lose by 37.

Since the beginning of 2015, I'm 1-8 picking games in London, and since I'm picking the Vikings to win in England this week, that means there's now a 60 percent chance the Browns are going to win by 65 points. 

By the way, the only person who hates international games more than me is Rams running back Todd Gurley. 

I couldn't agree more, Todd. 

Although both of us hate international games, there was one upside to having a Rams game in London this year: Thanks to the Brits, Sean McVay now has his own theme song.  

We should all probably go ahead and learn that now because I think we're supposed to sing it to him when he's named Millennial of the Year, which is definitely going to happen, because I'm pretty sure he has the award locked up at this point. 

Finally, if you guys have ever wondered which teams I'm actually good (and bad) at picking, here's a quick look: 

Teams I'm 6-1 picking this year: Browns, Cardinals, 49ers, Colts, Eagles, Lions (5-1) Seahawks (5-1), Saints (5-1) 

Teams I'm 1-5 picking this year: Dolphins

Every other team is somewhere in the middle.

Picks Record

Straight up in Week 7: 9-6

SU overall: 62-44

Against the spread in Week 7: 7-6-2

ATS overall: 52-51-3

You can find John Breech on Facebook or Twitter and if he's not doing one of those things, he's probably having a Jean-Claude Van Damme movie marathon.